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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

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Sherlock Holmes, how is the periodic table structured?
It's elementally, my dear Watson.

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

Watson didn't make much money working for Sherlock Holmes
Too many deductions

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

Why was Sherlock Holmes such a successful detective in Australia?
Because he had a good eye.
(Read out loud)

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

Sherlock Holmes faced a tax audit because...
All his clever deductions made the tax office very suspicious.

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

The stockbroker received notice from the IRS that he was being audited. He showed up at the appointed time and place with all his financial records, and then sat for what seemed like hours as the accountant pored over them.
Finally the IRS agent looked up and commented, “You must have been a tremendous fаn of Sir Arthur Doyle” “why would you say that?” wondered the broker. “Because you’ve made more brilliant deductions on your last three returns than Sherlock Holmes made in his entire career.”

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes Business jokes

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, Holmes said:
- ” Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see?"
Watson said,
"I see millions and millions of stars."
Holmes:
"And what does that tell you?"
Watson:
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorogically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
Holmes:
"Somebody stole our tent."

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God Jokes Sherlock Holmes Jokes

Watson came excitedly to Sherlock Holmes place and told him his dog had swallowed his ring. Sherlock told Watson,
"Don't worry. He will pass it eventually".
Watson replies,
"Thank you very much, Sherlock".
Sherlock says to Watson:
"It's alimentary, my dear Watson"

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Animal Jokes Sherlock Holmes Jokes Dog jokes

Why did the frog read Sherlock Holmes?
He liked a good croak and dagger.

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Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Animal Jokes Sherlock Holmes Jokes

"Watson, you look constipated!"
"No shiт, Sherlock."

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

2020 has been hard on all of us - Emma Watson

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes

Sherlock Holmes dies and goes to Heaven.
There is a brouhaha.
Sherlock Holmes asks St. Peter what seems to be the problem.
Apparently, Adam has gone 'walkabout' among all the souls.
It will take ages to find him. Holmes tracks down Adam, very quickly.
The Lord asks Holmes how he recognized Adam among the millions of souls, without ever having met him.
"Elementary, my dear God, he has no navel."

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes God Jokes Heaven And Hell Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson are hiking. They hiked all day long and then, having gotten tired, unpacked and quickly retired.
Holmes wakes up deep into the night, wakes Watson and says "Watson, do you see the bright stars and do you notice how clear the sky is? What can you deduce from it?"
Watson yawns and tries to play the game.
"Well, this clearly tells us the weather tomorrow is going to be dry and sunny."
"No, my friend. It’s much simpler than that. Someone has stolen our tent."

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Sherlock Holmes Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Friendship Jokes Life Jokes

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they laid down for the night, and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see." Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" Watson pondered for a minute.
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies, and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke.
"It tells me that someone has stolen our tent."

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