Communication Jokes

Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?"
"My father said it'd be a good idea, sir."
"Oh? And what does your father do?"
"He's in the Army, sir."

34 0

A man has came over to his wife in a request.
She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants.
3 hours later he is fuскing hookers and watching football and роrn with friend.

34 0

Dirty jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes Friendship Jokes Communication Jokes

A young fellow went to a Jewish Doctor and told the doctor he was worried because he could not get an еrестiоn.
Whereupon the doctor told him to eat Jewish Rye Bread.
So on his way home, the young man stopped a Jewish Bakery and asked for 25 Loaves of Rye Bread.
The Baker said "25 Loaves? It will get hard before you get rid of it."
Whereupon the patient in excitement said "Give me 50 loaves."

34 0

Jewish Jokes Food Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes Communication Jokes

Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.

34 0

Music and Musician Jokes Science jokes Communication Jokes

Did you ever notice:
Everything on a woman's upper body starts with a "B".
Blouse, Вrа, Bikini, Воовs and lower body with a "P" Peticoat, раnтiеs, рussy...
That's origin of "BP"!

34 0

Jokes about Women Communication Jokes Boob Jokes

A man walks into a clock shop where a beautiful woman is working. He walks to the counter unzips his fly and pulls out his соск.
The woman screams "excuse me sir this is a CLOCK SHOP".
"I know" - replied the man - "I want two hands and a face put on this".

33 0

Dirty jokes Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes Communication Jokes

Q: What is the definition of an extroverted tax accountant?
A: Someone who stares at YOUR shoes when talking to you.

33 0

Money jokes Accountant Jokes Communication Jokes Tax jokes

Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store?
A: Somebody told him he was ripped!

33 0

Fitness jokes Computer Jokes Communication Jokes

Q: What was the world's first palindrome?
A: Madam, I'm Adam.

33 0

Bible Jokes Communication Jokes History Jokes

What did the seal say when found nuts in the sea?
"Look I found deep nuts."

33 0

Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Communication Jokes

Q: What do you call a рот of angry water?
A: Boiling mad.

32 0

Communication Jokes

The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.

32 0

Communication Jokes

A college Professor, an avowed Atheist, was teaching his class.
He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated he was going to prove there is no God.
Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"
The lecture room fell silent.
You could have heard a pin drop.
Ten minutes went by.
Again the Professor taunted God, saying, "Here I am, God! I'm still waiting!"
His count-down got down to the last couple of minutes when a Marine, just released from active duty and newly registered in the class, walked up to the Professor and punched him full-force in the face.
The Professor tumbled from his lofty platform, and he was out cold before he hit the floor.
At first the students were shocked, and they babbled in confusion.
The young Marine took a seat in the front row and sat silently.
The class fell silent... waiting.
Eventually, the Professor came to.
When he finally regained the power of speech, he glared at the young Marine in the front row.
"What's the matter with you? Why on earth did you do that?"
The Marine smiled. "God was busy. He sent me."

32 0

Atheist Jokes School Jokes God Jokes Military Jokes Communication Jokes

There were five brothers named somebody, nobody, anybody mad and brain.
One day somebody and nobody were fighting, and just at that moment the anybody called police.
The police picked up the phone, and said hello.
Then Anybody:
"Hello sir! I want to inform you that somebody is beating nobody."
Police:
"Sorry!"
Anybody:
"Sir somebody is beating nobody"
Police:
"Are you mad? Who are you? What's your name?"
Anybody:
"No, sir mad is dancing, I am anybody"
Police:
"Shut up you idiот. What are you saying? Where have your brain gone? Is it lost?"
Anybody:
"No, sir brain is not lost. Brain is in the bathroom."

32 0

Police Officer Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Phone jokes

While I was working as a store Santa, a boy asked me for an electric train set.
"If you get your train," I told him, "your dad is going to want to play with it too. Is that all right?"
The boy became very quiet.
So, moving the conversation along, I asked, "What else would you like Santa to bring you?"
He promptly replied, "Another train."

32 0

Christmas Jokes Office and Work Jokes Kids Jokes Dad Jokes Communication Jokes

People say that time heals all wounds.
They obviously never got roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris

32 0

Chuck Norris Jokes Communication Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes

Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.

32 0

One-Liner Jokes Food Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes Communication Jokes Restaurant Jokes

Yo' Mama is so sтuрid, she told you that Yo' Mama be sтuрid.

31 0

Yo Momma Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes

The following conversation took place after a recently deceased Pakistani man knocked on the gates of Heaven for about 5 minutes.
St. Peter: "What do you want? "
Pakistani man: "I'm here for Jesus."
St. Peter: "Jesus, your taxi's here! "

31 0

Ethnic and Racial Jokes Men jokes Christian Jokes Communication Jokes Heaven And Hell Jokes

May: "Why did you slap me?!"
Michael: "I didn't slap your face! I High fived it!"
May: "I'm going to tell mom on you when we go to the sea side!"
Micheal: "Uh, Shore you will."
May: "Don't be such a beach."

31 0

Vulgar jokes Communication Jokes