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School Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

You''re so ugly, when yo'' mama dropped you off at school, she got a ticket for littering!

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Yo Momma Jokes School Jokes

"Mommy, all the kids at school say I'm a werewolf! Is that true?"
"No, of course not. Now shut up and comb your face."

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Gross Jokes School Jokes Kids Jokes Animal Jokes

A teacher asks her students if they're Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student.
"Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fаn of?"
"The Red Sox."
"Why's that?"
"Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I'm a Red Sox fаn too."
"That's not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a моrоn too?"
"No, that would make me a Yankees fаn!"

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Sports Jokes School Jokes Student jokes Soccer Jokes

Q: Why can't a blonde count to 70?
A: Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.

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Men vs Women Jokes School Jokes Blonde Jokes Math Jokes

Fred came home from his first day at school.
"Nothing exciting happened", he told his mother, "Except the teacher didn't know how to spell cat so I told her."

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School Jokes Animal Jokes

Dad:
"Can I see your report card, son?"
Son:
"I don't have it."
Dad:
"Why?"
Son:
"I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."

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Friendship Jokes School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Dad Jokes

John: Knock, knock.
Justin: Who’s there?
John: Gladys.
Justin: Gladys, who?
John: Gladys the weekend—no homework!

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Knock-knock jokes School Jokes

Little Johnny returns from school and says:
"Mam, in school we write dirтy swear-words so often!"
"But I hope you are not writing them, my son."
"No, I'm dictating them!"

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School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Little Johnny Jokes

The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson.
"Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?" she asked the instructor.
"P-u-t-t is correct," he replied.
"Put means to place a thing where you want it.
Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing."

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School Jokes Sports Jokes Golf jokes

How many schoolteachers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Anything not completed during the lesson is added to the homework.

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School Jokes

Teacher: Daniel, I’ve had to send you to the principal every day this week.
What do you have to say for yourself?
Daniel: I’m glad it’s Friday!

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School Jokes

Little Johnny took sеx ed and every day when little Johnny would come in from school he'll tell his dad for learning sеx ed well one day we'll just come in and he said that I got thrown out sеx ed Lil Johnny's daddy says how do you get thrown out sеx ed Little Johnny said well Dad I got in trouble for eating during class.

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Little Johnny Jokes School Jokes Food Jokes Sex Jokes Dad Jokes

When Chuck Norris was in kindergarden he made his teacher spit out her gum.

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School Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

Chad: Why do magicians do so well in school?
Josh: I don’t know. Why?
Chad: They’re good at trick questions.

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School Jokes

In high school, teachers had to raise up their hand to speak to Chuck Norris.

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School Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes

A middle aged woman was driving through a school zone when a policeman pulled her over for speeding.
As he was giving her the ticket, she said, “How come I always get a ticket and everyone else gets a warning?
Is it my face?”
“No, ma’am,” explained the officer, “it’s your foot.”

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Police Officer Jokes Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes School Jokes

Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.

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Chuck Norris Jokes School Jokes

A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with them to Jerusalem.
Little Johnny replied: "They couldn't get a baby sitter."

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Little Johnny Jokes School Jokes

How many Democrats does it take to change a light bulb?
That light bulb's never getting changed.

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News and Politics Jokes School Jokes Feminist Jokes Hipster Jokes Light bulb jokes

One day, a young boy was asked by his teacher to tell him what the chemical formula for water was.
The boy replied with "H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O".
The Teacher was stunned. "That's not right, how did you come up with that?"
The boy said, "Last week you said it was H2O!"

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School Jokes Science jokes