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A blonde walks by a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, "Cruise Special -- $99!".
She goes inside, lays her money on the counter and says, "I'd like the $99 cruise special, please."
The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes her in and sends her floating.
A second blonde comes by a few minutes later, sees the sign, goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special. She too is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the river.
Drifting into stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde.
They float side by side for a while before the first blonde asks, "Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?
The second blonde replies, " They didn't last year."
Money jokes Blonde Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes
Blonde Jokes
This guy goes out to Las Vegas, and wins really big in one of the casinos. After winning fifty thousand dollars at the сrар table, the casino decides to give the guy a night in the penthouse suite. The guy goes up to the room, opens the big double doors, and steps into a three room suite. The room is nothing but windows, with a fantastic view of the city. The guy drops his bag on money in a chair and stands looking out the windows at the city. He realizes he is all alone and needs someone to share his good fortune with. He calls down to the front desk and tells the clerk to send up one of the best high-priced call girls in the city. Thirty minutes later there’s a knock on the door. The guy opens it and there is the most gorgeous girl heThis guy goes out to Las Vegas, and wins really big in one of the casinos. After winning fifty thousand dollars at the сrар table, the casino decides to give the guy a night in the penthouse suite. The guy goes up to the room, opens the big double doors, and steps into a three room suite. The room is nothing but windows, with a fantastic view of the city. The guy drops his bag on money in a chair and stands looking out the windows at the city. He realizes he is all alone and needs someone to share his good fortune with. He calls down to the front desk and tells the clerk to send up one of the best high-priced call girls in the city.

Thirty minutes later there’s a knock on the door. The guy opens it and there is the most gorgeous girl he has ever seen. Long blond hair, short red dress, and spiked heels. She walks into the room. The guy goes over to the bar and fixes two drinks, he gives one to the hоокеr, and drinks one himself. "Now, down to business," he says, "how much for a hand job?"

The hоокеr says, "Honey, a hand job is $500.00"

"What, that’s outrageous.

"Come over here," She says walking toward one of the windows," see that sтriр mall over there," pointing out the window, "I own the last two stores on the end. I was able to buy those stores with the money I saved from giving hand jobs. I must be pretty dамn good.

"All right, sсrеw it, money is no object."

A half hour after she’s done the guy is sitting on the couch reveling in ecstasy. He gets up, goes to the bar and makes two more drinks. He gives one to the hоокеr and drinks one himself. "That was the best hand job I have ever had. How much for a вlоw job?

"Honey, a вlоw job is $5000.00."

"What, that’s outrageous."

"Come over here," She says walking toward another one of the window, see that hotel and casino over there on the corner," pointing out the window, "I own that, I was able to buy it with the money I saved from giving вlоw jobs. I must be pretty dамn good.

"All right, sсrеw it, money is no object." The guy gives her $5000.00. An hour after she’s done the guy is laying on the couch Head rolled back, eyes rolled up inside his head, a little drool coming out of the corner of his mouth. He gets up, barely able to stand, staggers over to the bar, mixes two more drinks ,gives one to the hоокеr, and drinks one himself.

"My god that was the best вlоw job I have ever had, I’ve gotta know, How much for some рussy?"

The hоокеr looks at him and says, " Honey if I had a рussy, I would own this whole city." has ever seen. Long blond hair, short red dress, and spiked heels. She walks into the room. The guy goes over to the bar and fixes two drinks, he gives one to the hоокеr, and drinks one himself. "Now, down to business," he says, "how much for a hand job?" The hоокеr says, "Honey, a hand job is $500.00" "What, that’s outrageous. "Come over here," She says walking toward one of the windows," see that sтriр mall over there," pointing out the window, "I own the last two stores on the end. I was able to buy those stores with the money I saved from giving hand jobs. I must be pretty dамn good. "All right, sсrеw it, money is no object." A half hour after she’s done the guy is sitting on the couch reveling in ecstasy. He gets up, goes to the bar and makes two more drinks. He gives one to the hоокеr and drinks one himself. "That was the best hand job I have ever had. How much for a вlоw job? "Honey, a вlоw job is $5000.00." "What, that’s outrageous." "Come over here," She says walking toward another one of the window, see that hotel and casino over there on the corner," pointing out the window, "I own that, I was able to buy it with the money I saved from giving вlоw jobs. I must be pretty dамn good. "All right, sсrеw it, money is no object." The guy gives her $5000.00. An hour after she’s done the guy is laying on the couch Head rolled back, eyes rolled up inside his head, a little drool coming out of the corner of his mouth. He gets up, barely able to stand, staggers over to the bar, mixes two more drinks ,gives one to the hоокеr, and drinks one himself. "My god that was the best вlоw job I have ever had, I’ve gotta know, How much for some рussy?" The hоокеr looks at him and says, " Honey if I had a рussy, I would own this whole city."
Отива един мъж на прост*тутка. Влиза и пита: Влиза мъж при проститутка и пита за цената за анален секс. Като я чува изпада в ужас. A man on a business trip to Las Vegas heard about how good the Las Vegas prostitutes were so on his first night there, he decided he would go out and try his luck. пр.стит.тка приводит клиента к себе, тот хочет чего-то для него... Karl-Heinz hat Lust auf Oralsex und geht ins Bordell. Am Empfang wird er zur Gerda in den 1. Stock geschickt. "Hallo Gerda. Ich hätte gerne Oralsex. Kannst du das überhaupt?" Gerda geht mit ihm zum... Ήταν ένας βιομήχανος, λεφτάς και έλεγε στο φίλο του ότι θέλει να γαμήσει μια πουτάνα. Um cara, andando pelas ruas de Las Vegas vê uma figura maravilhosa. Ele inicia uma conversa amigável e acaba fazendo a grande pergunta: — Quanto você cobra? — U$500 a punheta. — O quê? U$500 por...
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