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Chuck norris was born on May 6 1945. De Nazi surrenderd on May 7 1945. Чак Норрис родился 6 мая 1945 года. Германия сдалась 7 мая 1945 года. Совпадение? Я так не думаю Chuck Norris wurde am 6 Mai 1945 geboren. Die Nazis kapitulierten am 7 Mai 1945. ZUFALL !!! Chuck Norris naît le 6 mai 1945 l'Empire nazi chute le 7 mai 1945 Coïncidence ? Je ne pense pas Chuck Norris est Né le 6 mai 1945. Hitler a capitulé le 7 mai 1945.
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"Hey, today we got the four of clubs.
A guy named Samir al-Aziz, a Ba'ath party bad guy.
And we now have the four of clubs, the five of clubs, the five of spades and the seven of diamonds.
I don't know what game they're playing at the White House, but today, when it was confirmed that we had the four of clubs, Condoleezza Rice had to take off her blouse."
Bill Maher "The Pentagon said this week that the war in Iraq has cost $20 billion so far.
The breakdown is operations: $10 billion; personnel: $6 billion; getting Bush re-elected: priceless."
Bill Maher "The president boasted at the top of his press conference that we have the support now of Britain and Spain for our attack on Iraq.
You know, when you want to make it perfectly clear to the world that you're not an imperialist, the people you want in your corner are Britain and Spain."
Bill Maher "Iraq now says that it will, after all, destroy its missiles.
President Bush said, 'Please, I used to pull the same trick.
There'd be an intervention, I'd make a big show of pouring out the liquor and then there was a case under the floorboards.'" Bill Maher.
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1. Ali Baba and the forty thieves are now Ali Baba and the thirty thieves.  Ten were laid off.
2. Batman and Robin are now Batman and Pedro. Batman fired Robin…. and hired Pedro because Pedro was willing to work twice the hours at the same rate
3. Iron man now “air-pooling” with Superman to save fuel costs.
4. Women finally marrying for love, and not money
5. Q: With the current market turmoil, what’s the easiest way tomake a small fortune?
A: Start off with a large one.
6. The credit crunch is getting bad isn’t it? I mean, I let my brother borrow $10 a couple of weeks back, it turns out I’m now America’s third biggest lender.
7. Q: Why have Dubai real estate agents stopped looking out of the window in the morning?
A: Because otherwise they’d have nothing to do in the afternoon.
8. Q: What’s the difference between an American and a Zimbabwean?
A: In a few weeks, nothing.
9. Dow Jones is re-branded as “Down Jones”.
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Sluт jokes are just whoreable.
 
Q: What’s the difference between a whоrе and a вiтсh?
A: Whоrе’s fсuк everyone at the party, Вiтсhеs fсuк everyone at the party except you.
 
Q: How do you make a hormone?
A: Stick a rusty fсuкing chainsaw up her c*nt.
 
Q: What do you call kids born in whorehouses?
A: Brothel sprouts.
 
Q: What do you get when you cross a whоrе with a systems engineer?
A: A fcukin know-it-all!
 
Q: Who makes more money a drug dealer or a whоrе?
A: A hоокеr because she can wash her сrаск and reuse it.
 
Q: What do you call a Serbian whоrе?
A: Sloberdown Mycockyoubitch
 
Q: What does bungee jumping and whоrеs have in common?
A: They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you’re sсrеwеd.
 
Q: Did you hear about the Chinese whоrе that had a black baby?
A: She named him Sum Ting Wong!
 
Q: Why do Jewish men like to watch роrnо movies backward?
A: They like the part where the whоrе gives the money back.
 
Q: What do you call a whоrе with no legs?
A: A nightcrawler!
 
Q: What’s the difference between your job and a Dead Whоrе?
A: Your job still suскs!
 
Q: What’s the difference between a whоrе and a hockey player?
A: A hockey player takes a shower after 3 periods
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