Apple jokes. iPhones jokes

Emailing professors be like:
*polite greeting
*multiple paragraphs
*perfect grammar
Professor's reply:
"Sure."
- Sent from my iPhone

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My iPhone battery dies quicker than a black guy in a scary movie.

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One-Liner Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

Nowadays, most of the children dream about an IPhone, when I was a child - I wanted a dog.

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Animal Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

Think there’s a problem with my iPhone. The battery dies quicker than a black guy in the back of a police van.

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes Police Officer Jokes Political Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

One day an iPhone is going to explode, and Android people are going to be like, “Samsung has had this feature for years”.

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News and Politics Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

son: I got an ipad
daughter: I got an ipod
mom: I got an iphone
dad:.....Ipaid

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Dad Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

March was when my son celebrated his 15th birthday and I got him an iPhone. He just loved it. Who wouldn't? I celebrated my birthday in July and my wife made me very happy when she bought me an iPad. My daughter's birthday was in August so I got her an iPod Touch.

September came by, so for my wife’s birthday I bought her an iRon. It was around then that the fight started. What my wife failed to recognize is that the iRon can be integrated into the home network with the iWash, iCook and iClean.

This unfortunately activated the iRate, which led me to the iHospital and iGet out Thursday.

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Relationship Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

Ex: Gosh I hate you! Your soon fake. Ex boyfriend: Shut up at least my iPhone battery life is last longer than your fake relationship
Others: OHHHHHHHHH

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Insult Jokes Relationship Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

Q: What is written on Steve Jobs tombstone?
A: iCame, iSaw, iConquered, iLeft, iCameBack, iThinkDifferent, iMac, iPod, iTunes, iPhone, iPad, iCloud, iRIP
Q: Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret?
A: They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn’t have a Flash player installed!
Q: Why is it so sad that Steve Jobs died?
A: Everyone at Apple are crying their i’s out!
Q: What happens if you download the Princess Diana screensaver application?
A: Your iphone will keep crashing!
Q: Why won’t blondes take their iPhones to the bathroom?
A: Because they don’t want to give away their IP address!
Steve Jobs‘ funeral will be held next week, after which he will be reburied every six months in a slightly better coffin.
Do not touch MY iPhone. It’s not an usPhone, it’s not a wePhone, it’s not an ourPhone, it’s an iPhone.
I don’t understand why everybody wants the white iPhone, Everyone knows the black one runs faster.
I pressed the ‘home’ button but I’m still at school…
If your iPhone is black and you’re making Siri do tasks for you you’re pretty much saying slavery was OK.

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School Jokes Blonde Jokes Science jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

I’m still pondering whether to buy the new IPhone 7 or use the money to buy a lifetime supply of clothes for the family from Primark.

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Money jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Science jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

News- “Mobiles ‘may cause brain cancer'”
Download our iPhone app for more on this story.

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News and Politics Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

iPhone is really a terrible name considering how rarely I use it as a phone.
That’s like if my bed was named iSex.

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Science jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

Those Beats By Dr Dre headphones are a great product.
It used to be hard to spot a сunт unless he got his iPhone out…

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Science jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

Two little kids debated whether Santa Claus is black or white. So the little black and white boys sent their letter in the mail to The North Pole asking, "Santa, are you black or white? P.S. I, Harry, want an iPhone and Kentavious wants an X-Box One." (Kids these days) Santa soon replies with a letter saying, "It doesn't matter if I am black or white. The only thing that matters is that you don't judge by color."
"Ha, see Kentavious, Santa is white!" Harry said. "No way. He neva said dat," Ketavious defended. "But if Santa was black," Harry started, "He would have said,'It doesn't matter if I is black or white.' "

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Kids Jokes Christmas Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

I saw that new advert for Pizza Hut today that said “Now, order with your iPhone.”
Question… Couldn’t you always order with your iPhone, seeing as it is, in fact, a phone?

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Science jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

The new iPhone’s are out and some are complaining that their phones are bending.
Here’s an idea. If your phone bends too much, wrap it around your wrist and tell people it’s the Apple Watch.
You’ll be the first one to have it.

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Science jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

At 5.5″, the new iPhone will be вiggеr than the diскs of 50% of the men who own one.

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News and Politics Jokes Men jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

I like to put my iPhone 6+ in my front pocket. Now when I'm walking around, I finally have something 6 plus in my pants.

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One-Liner Jokes Apple and iPhone Jokes

The iPad: Because the iPhone was too small for other people to notice you.

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Apple and iPhone Jokes Science jokes

COLLEGE MATHEMATICS EXAM PAPER

INSTRUCTIONS: ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS. ALL QUESTIONS CARRY EQUAL MARKS.

You have dated a girl for 2 years, eventually she drops you for another guy. Calculate the percentage of time wasted.
(20 marks)

You bought a phone for your girlfriend and she gave it to another guy. Using trigonometric identities, derive a general formula for this type of love.
(20 marks)

(For Boys) You’re dating around 15 girls and every girl is demanding for a Samsung Galaxy and an iPhone 6s.

(a) Plot a graph of girls against prices of phones.
(15 marks)

(b) Use your graph to estimate your future poverty.
(5 marks)

You are dating other peoples’ sisters yet you don’t want to see any guy with your sister. Calculate the Percentage Error in your thinking capacity.
(20 marks)

You are a civil servant, your wife is a petty trader, your combined household income is less than $500. Your daughter who is awaiting result is using iPhone 6s and Samsung Galaxy both worth $2,000. Calculate the Percentage of your Parental Negligence.
(20 marks)

(For girls) You’re a girl and you have dated 20 guys with hard labor, use the law of diminishing return to calculate the substance that will be left for your husband to enjoy.
(20 marks)

You can’t give your wife $15 for a рот of soup, but you spend over $100 in bars and restaurants. Calculate the radius of your ‘stupidity’, take p=3.142.
(20 marks)

GOOD LUCK!

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