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Dark Humor Jokes

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Michael:
"What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?"
Matthew:
"I don't know. What?"
Michael:
"Candy corneas."
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Halloween Jokes Gross Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Morbid jokes
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
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Dark Humor Jokes Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road Jokes
What has more brains than a dead baby?
The wall behind it.
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Dark Humor Jokes Morbid jokes Dead baby jokes
Q: What did Нiтlеr get for his birthday?
A: An easy bake oven and a GI-Jew.
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Dark Humor Jokes Hitler Jokes
Since it started to rain, my wife can't stop looking through the window.
If it will start pouring down, I'm afraid I will have to let her inside.
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Dark Humor Jokes
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars?
A: You can see right through them.
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Dark Humor Jokes Holiday Jokes
Why did the black guy cross the road?
Who the fuск cares, why is he out of the cotton field?
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Dark Humor Jokes Black People Jokes
I like my women how I like my coffee....without a реnis.
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Jokes about Women Dark Humor Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes Coffee Jokes
What do you call a black guy driving a plane?
A pilot.
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Dark Humor Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes Black People Jokes Aviation Jokes Pilot Jokes
Maybe not the best message to put on an axe
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Dark Humor Jokes
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline?
When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
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Dark Humor Jokes Morbid jokes Dead baby jokes
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Get in the car.
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Dark Humor Jokes Superhero Jokes
Two guys are bungee-jumping one day.
The first guy says to the second.
"You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico."
The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they’ll need – a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.
They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square.
As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble.
Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work.
The first guy jumps.
He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that he has a few cuts and scratches.
Unfortunately, the second guy isn’t able catch him, he falls again, bounces and comes back up again.
This time, he is bruised and bleeding.
Again, the second guy misses him.
The first guy falls again and bounces back up.
This time, he comes back pretty messed up – he’s got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious.
Luckily, the second guy finally catches him this time and says, "What happened? Was the cord too long?"
The first guy says, "No, the cord was fine, but what the heck is a 'pinata'?"
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Dark Humor Jokes Office and Work Jokes Money jokes Mexican jokes Insurance Comedy
How did the tugboat get AIDS?
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
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Dark Humor Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes
A Mexican, white guy, and a black guy all go to hеll and the devil told them that if they can walk across his hand without burning in flames, then he will give them a second life on earth.
The white guy was really confident...first step, he caught a fire a disappeared.
The Mexican, nervously токе the first step and noticed that he wasn't dead, he took a couple more steps and disappeared.
The black guy started walking and made it all the way across without burning to flames.
Satan was shocked and asked him how he did it and the black guy replied "chocolate melts in your mouth not your hands"
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Dark Humor Jokes Mexican jokes Chocolate Jokes Black People Jokes
A golfer walks into the clubhouse of the local country club.
He tells the golf pro behind the counter that he wants to do 18 and he is going to need a caddy.
The golf pro informs him that the country club is running a promotion and if he tries out one of their experimental robot caddies, he can golf for free.
The golfer agrees and takes out the robot.
While on the golf course the robot caddy tells the golfer the wind speed, distance, even how hard to hit which club. He has the best game of his life.
The next time the golfer goes to the country club, he tells the golf pro that he wants to do 18 holes and that he wants to get one of the robot caddies.
He informs the golfer that they don't have the robot caddies anymore.
The golfer, all upset, tells him how great they were and asks him what happened.
The golf pro tells him that members were complaining that the sun would reflect of their metallic material and into their eyes.
The golfer asks him why they didn't just paint the robots black?
The golf pro said that they did paint them into black robot caddies, but the next day, 3 of them didn't show up and the other 3 robbed the pro shop.
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Dark Humor Jokes Golf jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Cause North Korea's missiles couldn't reach that far.
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Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road Jokes Dark Humor Jokes
Why did the black man buy 3 boxes of condoms?
Because he practices safe sеx and they were on sale.
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Dark Humor Jokes Men jokes Sex Jokes
When you're driving and Nicki Minaj is on all 3 radio stations at the exact same time, there's nothing left to do except crash your car.
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Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Car and driving jokes Dark Humor Jokes Music and Musician Jokes
What is the differance between a dead baby and a VHS tape?
The VHS tape don't stink when you leave it out in the sun.
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Dark Humor Jokes Gross Jokes Morbid jokes Dead baby jokes
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