Blonde Jokes - Page 46

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender:
Brunette:
"I'll have a B and C."
Bartender:
"What is a B and C?".
Brunette:
"Bourbon and Coke."
Redhead:
"And, I'll have a G and T."
Bartender:
"What's a G and T?"
Redhead:
"Gin and tonic."
Blonde:
"I'll have a 15."
Bartender:
"What's a 15?"
Blonde:
"7 and 7"

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Blonde Jokes

What's the difference between a lеsвiаn finger-fuскing a blonde and a Schwinn at the side of the road?
One's a bike in a ditch, and the other's...

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Blonde Jokes Lesbian jokes

How are blondes like postage stamps?
You liск'm, stick'em, and send'em on their way.

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Blonde Jokes

A blonde calls her husband at work one day and asks him, "Can you help me when you get home?"
"Sure," he replies. "What's the problem?"
"Well, I started a really hard puzzle and I can't even find the edge pieces."
"Look on the box," he said. "There's always a picture of what the puzzle is."
"It's a big rooster," she said.
The husband arrives home and tells his blonde wife, "Okay, put the corn flakes back in the box."

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Office and Work Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Food Jokes Blonde Jokes

What does a blonde say when you вlоw in her ear?
"Thanks for the refill!"

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Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes

This executive was interviewing a nervous young blonde women for a position in his company.
He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, “If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?”
The blonde quickly responded, “The living one.”

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Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Blonde Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

An old man walks into a bar, sits down, and starts crying.
The bartender asks, “What’s wrong?” The old man looks at the bartender through
Teary eyes and between sobs says, “I married a beautiful woman two days ago. She’s a natural blonde, twenty-five, intelligent, a marvelous cook, a meticulous housekeeper,
Extremely sensitive to my wants and needs, very giving, my best friend, and intensely passionate in bed.”
The bartender stares at the old man for a brief moment and says, “But that sounds great! You have what every man wants in a woman, so why are crying?”
The old man looks at the bartender and says, “I can’t remember where I live!”

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Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Blonde Jokes Men jokes Old People Jokes Friendship Jokes

Did you hear about the blonde who was a really good cook?
She could get pop tarts out of the toaster in one piece!

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Food Jokes Blonde Jokes

Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sеx?
A. Locking the car door.

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Blonde Jokes Sex Jokes Car and driving jokes

How do you get a blonde off of her knees?
Cum.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

We went to the movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it feels a little roomier.
Just as the feature was about to start a blonde woman from the center of the row got up and started working her way out.
"Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry, oops, excuse me."
By the time she got to me I was trying to look around her and I was a little impatient so I said,
"Couldn't you have done this a little earlier?"
"No!!" she said in a loud whisper, "The 'TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE PLEASE' message just flashed up on the screen and mine is out in the car."

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Blonde Jokes Office and Work Jokes Car and driving jokes Phone jokes

A nun, a priest, an Irishman, a Scotsman, a rabbi and a blonde walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and asks, "Is this some kind of joke?"

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Bar and Bartender Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Scottish Jokes Priest Jokes

Q: How did the blonde die raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Q: Why do blondes have more fun?
A: They're easier to keep amused.

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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes

A blonde finds a lamp with a genie inside. He says, "I will grant you three wishes."
The blonde says, "For my first wish, I want my love handles to disappear."
The genie replies, "Your wish is my command."
The blonde exclaims, "Holy shiт! What did you do with my ears?"

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Blonde Jokes

It was a really hot day and this blonde decided she would go buy a coke. She went to the coke machine and when she put her money in, a coke came out - so she kept putting money in.
And since it was such a hot day, a line had formed behind her. Finally, a guy on line said, "Will you hurry up? We're all hot and thirsty!"
And the blonde said, "No way. I'm still winning!"

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Men vs Women Jokes Money jokes Blonde Jokes

Q: Why did the blonde cross the road?
A: I don't know, and neither does she.

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Men vs Women Jokes Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Say What Again?
Did you hear about the blonde who didn't catch the joke?
It went over her head!

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes

A blond a, a brunette and a redhead were at the top of a cliff looking down at the beach.
Suddenly a genie appears to them and says "I will grant you each one wish if you'll jump off the side of this cliff."
So the redhead jumps off and shouts "Seagull" and turns into a seagull and flies away.
Then the brunette jumps off and shouts "Whale" and turns into a whale, falls into the sea and swims away.
Finally the blond runs towards the cliff edge, but trips at the last second, as as she falls she shouts out "Shiт"

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Animal Jokes Blonde Jokes Genie jokes

A blonde made several attempts to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems finding a buyer because the car had 340,000 miles on it. She discussed her problem with a brunette that she worked with at a bar.
The brunette suggested, "There may be a chance to sell that car easier, but it's not going to be legal."
"That doesn't matter at all," replied the blonde. "All that matters it that I am able to sell this car."
"Alright," replied the brunette. In a quiet voice, she told the blonde:
"Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop around here. Tell him I sent you, and he will turn the counter back on your car to 40,000 miles. Then it shouldn't be a problem to sell your car."
The following weekend, the blonde took a trip to the mechanic on the brunette's advice.
About one month after that, the brunette saw the blonde and asked, "Did you sell your car?"
"No!" replied the blonde. "Why should I? It only has 40,000 miles on it."

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Friendship Jokes Office and Work Jokes Car and driving jokes Money jokes Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes