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Love Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
Възрастна жена разхождала съпруга си с кола извън града, когато я спряла пътна полиция. - Госпожо, карате с превишена скорост... Ein Ehepaar ging einmal nach London, um Ferien zu machen. Als sie dort in einem Pub sassen, kam ein Engländer zu ihnen und fragte: "Where are you from?", und der Mann antwortete: "We are from Switzerland." Da die Frau kein Englisch konnte, fragte sie ihren Mann, was sie denn gesagt haben.... An elderly couple was driving across the country. While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol. “Ma’am, did you know you were speeding?” the officer said. The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, “What did he say?” “He said you were... Poliisi pysäytti 80 v. pariskunnan ja mummo oli vähän huonokuuloinen. Poliisi kysyi rekisteriotetta papalta Mummo kysyi heti ”Mitä se kysy?” Pappa vastasi, että ”rekisteriotetta”. Seuraavaksi...
An old couple gets pulled over and...
Lady cop:"May I see you license and registration sir?"
Old man:"Ugh, what did she say?"
Old wife:"She needs to see you license and registration dear."
The old man hands it to the lady cop and...
Lady cop:"Oh, I see you are from New York. I used to have a lover from New York, he was the worst lover I ever had."
Old man:"Ugh, what did she say?"
Old wife:"Nothing dear, she thinks she used to know you."
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Police Officer Jokes Men jokes Old People Jokes Love Jokes Couple jokes
Robinson came home in great excitement and said to his wife, “You’ll never believe it, dear, but I’ve discovered an entirely new position for lоvемакing.”
“Really,” said Mrs. Robinson, interested at once. “What is it?”
“Back to back.”
“But that’s crazy. We can’t do anything back to back.”
“Yes we can. I’ve persuaded another couple to help out.”
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Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Love Jokes
Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love.
The first woman said, “My husband is a psychologist, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that.”
The second woman proclaimed, “My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough, but really tunes my engine; I like that!”
The third woman replied, “Well my husband works for Microsoft and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it’s going to be, when I finally get it…”
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Computer Jokes Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes Love Jokes Psychology and Psychiatry Jokes
Teacher: Students, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Class: "Brotherly love."
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Student jokes School Jokes Animal Jokes Men jokes Love Jokes
There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
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Men jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Flirt jokes Love Jokes
I'm going to watch my wedding video later "backwards".
I love the end bit when she takes the ring off, goes back down the aisle and jumps in the car.
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Wedding jokes Car and driving jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Love Jokes
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
sugar is sweet,
but nothing compared to you.
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Relationship Jokes Food Jokes Flirt jokes Love Jokes
Q: Why do walruses love a tupperware party?
A: They're always on the lookout for a tight seal.
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Dirty jokes Partying and Bad Behavior Jokes Love Jokes
Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
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Hipster Jokes Love Jokes
I told my crush at school, "If you love me, come wearing red tomorrow." The next day she came in wearing black! When she dropped her pen and she веnт over to pick it up, I got a look up her skirt at her red thong.
Moral of the story: she really loves me underneath it all.
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Dirty jokes School Jokes Love Jokes
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?"
"So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuск."
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Marriage and Family Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Dirty jokes Music and Musician Jokes Love Jokes
A woman meets with her lover, who is also her husband's best friend.
They make love for hours. Afterwards, as they lie in bed, the phone rings. Since it's the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. The best friend listens, only hearing her side of the conversation:
"Hello? Oh, hi... I'm so glad that you called... Really? That's wonderful... Well, I'm happy to hear you're having such a great time... Oh, that sounds terrific... Love you, too. OK. Bye-bye."
She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?"
"Oh," she replies, "That was my husband telling me about the wonderful time he's having on his fishing trip with you."
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Men vs Women Jokes Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Animal Jokes Friendship Jokes Fishing Jokes Love Jokes
A teenager is a hopeless romantic who never falls in love more then twice a week.
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Teenager and High School Jokes Kids Jokes Love Jokes
If Santa comes down the chimney this year and tries to stuff you in his sack, don't worry, because I wished for you for Christmas.
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Christmas Jokes Flirt jokes Love Jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue...
I'm in love but not with you...
When we broke up you thought I cried
But all it was...
Was another guy,
You told your friends that I was a trick,
I told mine that you had a weak diск...
I said I loved you
And you thought it was true,
But guess what baby?!
You got played too!
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Dirty jokes Friendship Jokes Funny Poems Love Jokes
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love.
In college it means someone is too drunк to stand on their own.
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Beauty Jokes School Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes College jokes Love Jokes
What’s the difference between a sеx night with the husband and one with the truelove?
About a half an hour...
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Sex Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Love Jokes
Do you know why bankers are good lovers?
They know first hand the penalty for early withdrawal.
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Banker Jokes Men jokes Love Jokes
When Adam asked Eve out for dinner she replied:
"Oh I'd love to, but I haven't a thing to wear."
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God Jokes Jokes about Women Love Jokes
Голямата разлика между платеният с*екс и безплатният с*екс е, че с*ексът за пари обикновено струва много по-малко.
The big difference between sеx for money and sеx for free is that sеx for money usually costs a lot less.
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Love Jokes Money jokes Sex Jokes
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