Customer service jokes

Customer: Could you please call me a cab?
Little Johnny: OK... "You're a cab."

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Client: "Please remove the unnecessary circle at the end of the sentence."
Me: "You mean... the period?"
Client: "I don't care what you designers call it; it is unsightly. Delete it."

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Car and driving jokes Office and Work Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes

When my customer ordered iced tea, I asked, "Sweetened or unsweetened?"
Her answer: "What's the difference?"

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Customer service jokes Stupid Jokes

I spotted several pairs of men's Levi's at a garage sale. They were sizes 30, 31, and 32, but I was looking for size 33.
So I asked the owner if he had a pair. He shook his head.
"I'm still wearing the 33s," he said. "Come back next year."

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Men jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

I decided to grab a burger at a drive-thru.
There were no cars in sight, so I rolled up to the pay window.
"We're still serving breakfast. And you have to order at the speaker," the clerk scolded.
I drove all the way around the building to the squawk box and ordered a breakfast sandwich.
"I'm sorry," she said, "we are now serving lunch."

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Car and driving jokes Food Jokes Customer service jokes

Instead of saying, "And here's your receipt," cashiers should say, "Will you throw this away for me?"

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Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

While I was out to lunch, my coworker answered my phone and told the caller that I would be back in 20 minutes.
The woman asked, "Is that 20 minutes Central Standard Time?"

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Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Food Jokes Customer service jokes Phone jokes

While we were working at a men's clothing store, a customer asked my coworker to help her pick out a tie that would make her husband's blue eyes stand out.
"Ma'am," he explained, "any tie will make blue eyes stand out if you tie it tight enough."

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Marriage and Family Jokes Office and Work Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Customer service jokes Beauty Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

A colleague was planning a trip to my business office and asked if I could find him a hotel with exercise facilities. I called several hotels, with no luck. Finally, I thought I had found one.
I asked the receptionist if the hotel had a weight room.
"No," she replied, "but we have a lobby and you can wait there."

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Fitness jokes Office and Work Jokes Customer service jokes Hotel Jokes

Calling for information about one of my credit cards, I got the following recorded prompt: "Please enter your account number as it appears on your card or statement."
I did as instructed, and the system said, "Please enter your five-digit ZIP code."
After I put that in, I got a third message: "If you would like your information in English, press one."

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Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Phone jokes

Don't get upset if I ask you where something is in Target when you choose to wear a red shirt and khakis to shop.

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Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

I sent a reminder to a client that it was time to visit the eye doctor.
He called back to inform me that he would not be coming in because, as he put it, "I have a new obstetrician."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Customer service jokes Phone jokes

Mary goes to the post office to buy 50 stamps for her Hanukkah cards.
"What denomination?" asks the postal clerk.
Mary thinks a second before replying, "Give me six Orthodox, 12 Conservative, and 32 Reform."

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Customer service jokes

I was looking at the pies offered by a nearby café. They had cherry, apple, berry, peach, and Herman's.
"What type of pie is Herman's?" I asked the waiter.
"Apple," he said.
"Then why is it called Herman's pie?"
"Because Herman called in to reserve it."

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Business jokes Food Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

Ad from a printer I will not be doing business with: "We offer a full line of pricing options that will meet or exceed your printing budget."

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Business jokes Money jokes Customer service jokes

I provide technical support for the computer software published by my company.
One day, over the phone, I was helping a customer install a product on a Macintosh.
The procedure required him to delete an old file.
On the Mac, there is an icon of a trash can that is used to collect items to be permanently deleted.
I told the customer to click on the old file and drag it to the trash.
Then I had him perform a few other steps. As a reminder, I said, "Don't forget to empty the trash."
Obediently he replied, "Yes, dear."

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Marriage and Family Jokes Technology Jokes Computer Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

When our air conditioner broke down, we called for a serviceman to come and take a look at it.
It turned out to be a high school classmate of my husband's named Love.
He said next time we needed any repairs to ask for him.
The next year when we needed service again, we requested Mr. Love.
I took the day off from work and waited for him to arrive.
After he had worked on our air conditioner, he left his work order behind.
It had my name and said: "Wants Love in afternoon."

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Marriage and Family Jokes Technology Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Love Jokes School Jokes

A woman called our airline customer-service desk asking if she could take her dog on board.
"Sure," I said, "as long as you provide your own kennel."
I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over.
The customer was flummoxed: "I'll never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!"

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Pet Jokes Animal Jokes Aviation Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Dog jokes

When I arrived at a hotel in order to fill in my identities I noticed the word "sеx" so I wrote: YES PLEASE.

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Sex Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes Hotel Jokes

Christian Doctor: "Your recovery was a miracle!"
Christian Patient: "Thank God! Now I don't have to pay you."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Money jokes God Jokes Customer service jokes Christian Jokes