Customer service jokes

Innkeeper: "The room is $15 a night. It's $5 if you make your own bed."
Guest: "I'll make my own bed."
Innkeeper: "Good. I'll get you some nails and wood."

29 0

I bought these shoes from a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day!

1 1

Customer service jokes Drug Jokes Bad Habits Jokes

The barbershop was crowded, so the woman at the cash register offered to put my name on the waiting list.
"What is it?" she asked.
"Stephen, with a P-H," I said.
Minutes later, a chair opened up, and my name was called: "Pheven?"

85 0

Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Hairdresser Jokes

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blond begins to slide from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the horse's side anyway.
The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious of its slipping rider.
Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blond attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune Frank, a Wal-Mart greeter, sees her dilemma and unplugs the horse.
...... And you thought all they did was say Hello.

80 0

Blonde Jokes Animal Jokes Customer service jokes

A woman goes into a store to buy a fishing rod and reel.
She doesn’t know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the register.
There is a store employee standing there with dark shades on.
She says, "Excuse me sir... can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says , "Ma’am I’m blind but if you drop it on the counter I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound that it makes."
She didn’t believe him, but dropped it on the counter anyway.
He said "That’s a 6′ graphite rod with Zebco 202 reel and 10 lb. test line... It’s a good all around rod and reel and it’s $20.00."
She says, "That’s amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I think it’s what I’m looking for so I’ll take it."
He walks behind the counter to the register.
And in the meantime the woman farts.
At first she is embarrassed but then realizes that there is no way he could tell it was her... being blind he wouldn’t know that she was the only person around.
He rings up the sale and says, "That will be $25.50."
She says, "But didn’t you say it was $20.00?"
He says, "Yes ma’am, the rod and reel is $20.00, the duck call is $3.00, and the catfish stink bait is $2.50!"

44 0

Customer service jokes Jokes about Women Money jokes Animal Jokes

If you understand English, press 1.
If you do not understand English, press 2.

203 0

Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

It was the standard series of check-in questions that every traveler gets at the airlines counter, including, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?"
"If it was put there without my knowledge," I asked, "how would I know?"
The agent behind the counter smiled smugly. "That's why we ask."

63 0

Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes

A customer walked into our store looking for Christmas lights.
I showed her our top brand, but, wanting to make sure each bulb worked, she asked me to take them out of the box and plug them in.
I did, and each one lit up.
"Great," she said.
I carefully placed the string of lights back in the box.
But as I handed them to her, she looked alarmed.
"I don't want this box," she said abruptly. "It's been opened."

32 0

Christmas Jokes Office and Work Jokes Technology Jokes Customer service jokes

I ordered a foot-long sandwich from a take-out restaurant and asked the clerk to cut it into fourths.
"I'm sorry, I can't," she said. "I already cut it in half."

69 0

Office and Work Jokes Food Jokes Math Jokes Customer service jokes Stupid Jokes Restaurant Jokes

It's so quiet in the Hollywood Starbucks this morning, you can hear a name drop.

66 0

Business jokes Customer service jokes

There were only two people in line ahead of me at the electronics store, yet the wait was dragging on forever.
Finally, the customer behind me muttered, "Mr. Hare must be on vacation."
Only then did I notice the name tag on the man at the register. It read: "Mr. Turtle, sales associate."

66 0

Customer service jokes

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk,
"How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,
"That's not a TV, it's a microwave!"

34 0

Blonde Jokes Customer service jokes

A waiter walks up to a table of old ladies eating their lunch and asks, "Is anything OK?"

66 0

Waiter Jokes Food Jokes Old People Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

Starbucks is offering a new drink to honor Nancy Pelosi.
They call it the "fullacrapuccino".

0 0

Business jokes Food Jokes Political Jokes Democrat jokes Customer service jokes

Even though telemarketers are slightly less beloved than dentists and tax auditors, that's the job my friend took during his summer vacation.
Halfway through one of his sales pitches, he heard a clicking at the other end of the line.
Thinking the man may have hung up, he asked, "Are you still there?"
"Yeah, still here," said the man.
"Sorry, I heard a click and I thought you'd been disconnected."
"No," the man said, "that would sound more like this."
He then proceeded to show me what it would sound like by slamming down the phone.

0 0

Business jokes Dentist Jokes Customer service jokes Tax jokes

Q: How many telemarketers does it take to change a light-bulb?
A: Only one, but she has to do it while you're eating dinner.

69 0

Office and Work Jokes Food Jokes Customer service jokes Light bulb jokes

The bean soup I'd ordered was mostly water.
I decided to tell the waitress.
"This soup is awful," I said.
"I know," she said. "I don't like bean soup either."

71 0

Waiter Jokes Food Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

I was at the customer-service desk, returning a pair of jeans that was too tight.
"Was anything wrong with them?" the clerk asked.
"Yes," I said. "They hurt my feelings."

35 0

Customer service jokes

Not the people who posted this sign at a bookstore that was going out of business: "Sorry, no public restroom. Try amazon.com."

70 0

Business jokes Customer service jokes

When asked for his name by the coffee shop clerk, my brother-in-law answered, "Marc, with a C."
Minutes later, he was handed his coffee with his name written on the side: Cark.

71 0

Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Coffee Jokes