Facebook Jokes

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Husband and Wife sitting at home on sofa, Husband Pulls out his phone and starts to check Facebook.
Wife: your always on your phone, why don’t you pay me any attention.
Husband: Maybe because my phone is smart and actually reacts when i finger it

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Marriage and Family Jokes Facebook Jokes

If time is money…. Facebook owes me like…27 billion dollars…

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Money jokes Facebook Jokes Internet Jokes

I’m quite fат and have been getting a lot of cyberbullying recently on facebook. Parents can be really cruel sometimes.

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Facebook Jokes Fat Jokes

People who create multiple Facebook accounts so they can like their own status are probably the same people who spice up their sеx life by маsтurватing with a different hand sometimes so they feel like it’s a strangers hand.

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Sex Jokes Facebook Jokes Internet Jokes Masturbation jokes

Some people are so strange.
They’ll happily accept your friend request on Facebook, but won’t even acknowledge you when you’re parked outside their house all day.

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Facebook Jokes Friendship Jokes Criminal Jokes

I was on Facebook last night and got рissеd off by one attention seeking girl.
It was all stuff like, “I’m bored…” and, “Feeling sad today…” and, “I just need someone to love me…”
Eventually, I looked up from my phone and said, “Shut the fсuк up and eat your starter or this will be our last anniversary meal.”

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Marriage and Family Jokes Facebook Jokes

Why is Canada so good at social media platforms like Facebook?
They have so many lakes.

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Canadian jokes Facebook Jokes

If rolling your eyes burned calories, Facebook would be my gym.

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Facebook Jokes Fitness jokes

Tech experts say Facebook is planning to launch a service that lets users send each other money using the site’s messaging feature.
Said moms, “Oh, so NOW you’re happy I’m on Facebook?”

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Money jokes Facebook Jokes Internet Jokes

Facebook has taught me people don’t get most jokes unless you put them over a picture and call it a meme.

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Facebook Jokes

I'm tired of all these old people joining Facebook. It's not for you. All I'm saying is, I don't want to go on Facebook and be invited to be a fаn of 'The Andy Griffith Show.'

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Insult Jokes Facebook Jokes

Facebook is reportedly thinking of ways to incorporate health into their array of services.
Here’s how it’ll work: If you get a cut or a bruise or something, take a picture of it and post it.
If it gets more than 100 likes, you’re cured.

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Office and Work Jokes Facebook Jokes Internet Jokes

I don't want to startle anyone, but Becky on Facebook cannot believe how fast the weekend flew by.

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Facebook Jokes One-Liner Jokes

Girl on Facebook:OH MY GOD i just found out my grandad built the titanic !!
Me:Well he didn't do a very good job did he ?

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Insult Jokes God Jokes Facebook Jokes

A mother in China gave birth to a 15-pound baby. Chinese officials say it’s so big, it can do the work of two babies.” -Conan O’Brien
Donald Trump announced he is building a new hotel four blocks from the White House. And with any luck, that will be about as close to the White House as Donald Trump will ever get.” -Jay Leno
“President Obama has ordered new sanctions against Iran’s central bank for engaging in deceptive practices. I’ve got a better idea, how about sanctions against OUR banks for deceptive practices?” -Jay Leno
A new report found that Facebook has created more than 450,000 jobs. Unfortunately, photos posted on Facebook have ended 550,000 jobs.” -Jimmy Fallon
According to USA Today, more Chinese tourists are coming to America. They get to see things they’ve never seen before: the Grand Canyon, the Statue of Liberty, adults working in factories.” -Jay Leno
Today, the United Nations approved a resolution to lift the sanctions against Iraq. … Yeah, the move will allow Iraqis to buy things they don’t have, such as medicine and weapons of mass destruction.

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Office and Work Jokes News and Politics Jokes USA Jokes Facebook Jokes Hotel Jokes Banker Jokes American Presidents Humor

Facebook memories are a great way to see how fат you've gotten.

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Facebook Jokes Fat Jokes

I just changed my Facebook password to ’14 days’ but it said it was ‘Too weak

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Facebook Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

If you love something let it go but make sure one of your close friends is still friends with it on Facebook so you can stalk it.

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Facebook Jokes Friendship Jokes Dating Jokes

Kid 1:I befriended taylor swift on facebook
Kid 2:shiт now she will write a song about that

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Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Kids Jokes Facebook Jokes

A post I made on Facebook seems to have upset Jewish people.
:^(

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Facebook Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes