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Animal Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

A couple of pigeons made a date to meet on the ledge on the tenth floor of a skyscraper.
The female was there on time, but the male arrived an hour late.
"Where were you? I was worried sick."
"It was such nice day, I decided to walk."

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Sick and Death Jokes Sports Jokes Animal Jokes Couple jokes

A blonde and her husband were driving home, when they hit a rabit.
They both got out of the car and stood over the poor creature.
The blonde and her husband just stood their, when she said "Oh I know."
So she when in the car and rumaged through her purse and came out with what looked a bottle.
She poured it on the rabit and they both got in the car.
Suddenly the rabit got up hopped a little bit and waved, hopped a little and waved, hopped to the top of the hill and waved.
Then dissapered over it.
The husband just stared at his wife and said "Honey, what did you pour on that rabit?"
His wife just said "Hair Restorer with a permanent wave."

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Blonde Jokes Car and driving jokes Animal Jokes

What goes "oom... oom"?
A соw walking backward!

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Animal Jokes Communication Jokes

What did the flower say to be the bee?
"Buzz off you sтuрid ugly hоrny сunт."

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Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Vulgar jokes Communication Jokes

What is a snake's favorite subject in school?
Hissssstory.

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School Jokes Animal Jokes History Jokes

What do you get if you cross a parrot with a shark?
A bird that will talk your ear off!

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Communication Jokes Parrot jokes Animal Jokes

One simply cannot play fair and win in a zoo - there are way too many cheetahs.

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Animal Jokes

Q: What do you call a соw with a twitch?
A: Beef jerky.

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Animal Jokes Sex Jokes

Chuck Norris can fall up.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Animal Jokes Music and Musician Jokes

Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were prime mates.

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IT jokes Animal Jokes Computer Jokes

A policeman caught a nasty little boy with a penknife in one hand and a squirrel in the other.
"Now listen here," the policeman said, "Whatever yo do to that poor, defenseless creature I shall personally do to you."
"In that case," said the boy, "I'll kiss it's вuтт and let it go."

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Police Officer Jokes Money jokes Kids Jokes Food Jokes Animal Jokes

Q: What's worse than ants in your pants?
A: Uncle.

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Sex Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Animal Jokes Dirty jokes

Teacher:
"If you bought 8 hotdogs,9 cheese burgers and 7 fillet o fishes and you ate 8 hotdogs 9 cheese burger and 7 fillet o fish what do you have at the end?"
Little Johnny:
"A bad blatter issue."

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Little Johnny Jokes Food Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Animal Jokes Math Jokes School Jokes

What do you call a cat that wants to have sеx?
Freak.

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Animal Jokes Sex Jokes Communication Jokes

What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?
Doyouthinkysaraus.

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Communication Jokes Dinosaur jokes Animal Jokes Double Meaning and Wordplay Jokes

Q: How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?
A: Have you ever seen a rabbit with glasses?

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Food Jokes Animal Jokes

I am a dog
And you are a flower.
I lift my leg up
And give you a shower.

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Gross Jokes Animal Jokes Funny Poems

Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Sick and Death Jokes Animal Jokes

If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?

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Sex Jokes Animal Jokes Dirty jokes Flirt jokes

I have got a new dog.
We have trained together for two months and imagine, after these two months I was able to reach him my paw and managed even barking around on command.
My dog can be proud of myself.

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Pet Jokes Animal Jokes Dog jokes