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One-Liner Jokes

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The blonde complained to her friend, "I have a man I never could trust. Why, he cheats so much I'm not even sure this baby I'm carrying is his!"
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Q. How do you teach a blonde math?
A. Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, and square root her.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
A blonde goes to a football game. The quarterback starts running with the ball and she chases him yelling "I want my quarter back!"
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
The authorities in America conducted a survey to ascertain why they did not receive many emergency calls from blondes. After exhasted studies the answer is "They can find the nine but cannot find the eleven"
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Superhero Jokes
“I asked the doctor how my check-up went. All he said was, 'Get will soon.'”
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Medical and Doctor Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
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Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes Boss Jokes
Boy: you're really pretty
Girl:thanks
Boy:I wish there was something between us
Girl:I do too
Boy:really?! Like what?
Girl: a wall!
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Insult Jokes One-Liner Jokes
How do you get a blonde off of her knees?
Cum.
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their necks in sand?
A: Not enough sand.
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Banjo vergraben Какво е политик, заровен до шията в земята?,Недовършена работа! ¿Qué es un político enterrado en la arena hasta el cuello?,Un trabajo mal acabado Was hat man, wenn man 3 Männer bis zum Hals in Sand eingegraben hat? - Zu wenig Sand. Was ist passiert wenn Sie einen Anwalt bis zum Hals im Sand begraben finden? Es war nicht genug Sand vorhanden. Was ist, wenn drei Juristen bis zum Hals im Sand stecken? Dann hat der Sand nicht gereicht. Hvad har man når en advokat er begravet i sand til halsen? - Ikke nok sand. - Vet du vad felet är om du har en advokat som är nedgrävd upp till halsen i sand? - Nä. - För lite sand. O que acontece quando você enterra seis advogados na areia até o pescoço? R: Falta areia. Cosa avete con un avvocato nella melma fino al collo? Troppa poca melma!
Office and Work Jokes Dark Humor Jokes One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes Sick and Death Jokes Morbid jokes
A man walks into a lawyer's office and inquires about the rates.
"Fifty dollars for three questions, "replies the lawyer.
"Isn't that awfully steep?" asks the man.
"Yes," the lawyer replies, "and what's your third question?"
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В една адвокатска кантора се провежда следният разговор: Anwälte - Трябва да знаете, че визитата при мен струва 500 евро и можете да зададете само два въпроса. Sagt ein Mann zum Anwalt: Мъж отива при адвокат за помощ. Walking into a lawyers office, a man asked what his rates were. "Fifty dollars for three questions," the lawyer stated. "Isn't that awfully expensive?" the man asked?" "Yes," replied the lawyer. "What's your third question?" Un signore va da un avvocato e gli chiede: "Ma è vero che lei chiede mille euro ogni tre domande? Non le sembra di essere un po' troppo caro?" "Sì" risponde l'avvocato "E qual è la sua terza domanda?" Un homme demande à un avocat : - Quel est le montant de vos honoraires ? - 10 000 euros pour 3 questions, répond le avocat. - N'est-ce pas un peu excessif ? - A discuter. Quelle est votre troisième question ? Un uomo si reca nello studio di un avvocato e gli chiede quale sia il suo onorario. E l'avvocato: "100.000 lire ogni 3 domande". "Ma non e' un po' caro?". E l'avvocato: "Si', e ora mi faccia la... Ruft ein Mann beim Rechtsanwalt an: "Wie teuer sind drei Fragen bei Ihnen?" "Das kostet 500 Euro." "Ist das nicht etwas teuer?" "Nein, der Preis ist üblich. Und ihre letzte Frage?" Pewien mężczyzna zwraca się do adwokata, którego mu polecono: - Czy to prawda, że bierze pan aż 20 euro za dwa pytania? - Tak. Jakie jest pańskie drugie pytanie? Der Anwalt erklärt: “Ich bin ein Spitzenjurist und meine Zeit ist Gold wert! Daher dürfen Sie mir für die 150 Euro Honorar nur 3 Fragen stellen!” Darauf der Mandant: “Drei Fragen für 150 Euro? Ist... У адвоката запитують: - Скільки ви берете? - 1000 доларів за 3 питання. - Так дорого?! - Так. І яким буде ваш третє питання? Klaus fragt seinen Anwalt: „Was kostet es, wenn ich Ihnen zwei Fragen stelle?“ – „1.000 Euro“ antwortet der Anwalt und sagt „Wie lautet Ihre zweite Frage?“ A man needing some legal help walks into a law firm. He asks an attorney: "If I give you $300 to help answer two legal problems I have, will you help me?" The attorney replies: "Sure, what's the... Virtasen juuri perustamaan asianajotoimistoon saapui ensimmäinen asiakas. Virtanen ilmoitti, että kysymyksiin vastaamiset maksavat sitten 100 euroa kappaleelta. ”Eikö tuo ole vähän liian kallista?”... U prawnika: - Jaką opłatę muszę wnieść, żeby otrzymać od pana fachową poradę? - 1000 złotych za trzy pytania. - Hmm, to troszeczkę drogo, nie uważa pan? - No, może troszeczkę. A jakie jest pańskie... Un hombre va a un abogado. - ¿Y usted cuánto cobra por una consulta rápida? - 300 euros por tres preguntas. - Vaya, es un poco caro, ¿no? - Sí... y dígame, ¿cuál es su tercera pregunta? Mies käveli sisään lakiasiaintoimistoon ja kysyi hintoja. - 300 markkaa ja kolme kysymystä, lakimies vastasi. - Eikö se ole hirveää kiskontaa? - Kyllä,vastasi lakimies, - ja mikä olikaan teidän... «Du er jo kjent for å være en dyktig advokat, så jeg lurte på om du kunne svare på to spørsmål for 1500 kroner?» «Det skulle bare mangle! Hva er det andre spørsmålet?» Egy ügyfél kérdezi az ügyvédtől: - Mennyi tiszteletdíjat kér jogi tanácsokért? - 20.000 forintba kerül három válasz. - Nem túl drága ez egy kicsit? - De igen. És mi a harmadik kérdése? Přijde muž k právníkovi do kanceláře a ptá se, kolik si účtuje za své služby. "mám taxu 1000 korun za 3 zodspovězené otázky," zní odpověď právníka. "A není to příliš vysoká cena?" diví se muž.... A man phones a lawyer and asks, “How much would you charge for just answering three simple questions?” The lawyer replies, “A thousand dollars.” “A thousand dollars!” exclaims the man. “That's very... Батко Ѓорѓија отишја куде адвоката и га прашуе: - Извини да те прашам, колко наплаќаш за услуге? - 100 евра за три прашања. - Абе нели е тој скупо? - Скупо е, ама тој ти е – одговара адвокат. - А...
Office and Work Jokes Money jokes Men jokes One-Liner Jokes Lawyer Jokes
A nun, a priest, an Irishman, a Scotsman, a rabbi and a blonde walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and asks, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Bar and Bartender Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Scottish Jokes Priest Jokes
Q: How did the blonde die raking leaves?
A: She fell out of the tree.
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Men vs Women Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Q: Why did the blonde cross the road?
A: I don't know, and neither does she.
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Men vs Women Jokes Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road Jokes Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
A kangaroo mom with seven babies in her pouch told another kangaroo mom, "These sleepovers are killing me."
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Kids Jokes Animal Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Say What Again?
Did you hear about the blonde who didn't catch the joke?
It went over her head!
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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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Chuck Norris Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes One-Liner Jokes Superman jokes Superhero Jokes
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret
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Чък Норис знае тайната на Виктория (Victoria's secret)
Chuck Norris Jokes One-Liner Jokes
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