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School Jokes

Newest jokes in this category
Billy: What a pair of strange socks you're wearing, one is green and the other is blue with red spots!!
Drew: Yes, it's really strange.
I've got another pair just like that at home.
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- Г-н полицай, обувките ви са различни. Отидете си до в къщи и ги разменете! - Вече ходих - и там са същите.
School Jokes Kids Jokes
What is a teacher's favorite kind of music?
Class-ical.
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School Jokes Music and Musician Jokes
Tequila is an excellent teacher...
Just last night it taught me to count...
One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor!
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School Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes One-Liner Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.
Trying to make the matter clearer, he said:
"Now, students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face."
"Yes, sir," the boys said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "It's because yer feet ain't empty."
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School Jokes Student jokes
My math teacher called me average...
How mean!
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School Jokes Math Jokes
Why can’t orphans go on school field trips?
Parent Signature: _______
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School Jokes
Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon.
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School Jokes
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.
“Why of course”, comes the reply.
The first man then asks:
“Where are you from?”
“I’m from Scotland”, replies the second man.
The first man responds:
“You don’t say, I’m from Scotland too! Let’s have another round to Scotland.”
“Of Course”, replies the second man.
Curious, the first man then asks:
“Where in Scotland are you from?”
“Aberdeen”, comes the reply.
“I can’t believe it”, says the first man. “I’m from Aberdeen too! Let’s have another drink to Aberdeen.”
“Of course”, replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks:
“What school did you go to?”
“Sаinт Andrews”, replies the second man. “I graduated in ’62.”
“This is unbelievable!”, the first man says. “I went to Sаinт Andrews and graduated in ’62, too!”
About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar.
“What’s been going on?”, he asks the bartender
“Nothing much,” replies the bartender. “The MacClyde twins are drunк again.”, because there ain’t no way I can pass that test.”anisms.
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School Jokes Men jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes
I hated my job as an origami teacher. Too much paperwork.
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Office and Work Jokes School Jokes
Teacher: Kids what are something you have that make you happy?
Kid 1: I have my family to make me happy.
Kid 2: I have my friend to make me happy.
Teacher: What about you Sean?
Sean: I have to take pills to make me happy…
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School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Kids Jokes Friendship Jokes
Chuck Norris doesn't teach his kicks.
They speak for themselves.
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School Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes
Q: How can you tell if a University of Tennessee football player is married?
A: There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.
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Sports Jokes School Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Soccer Jokes
Legendarily naughty Little Johnny sat in class quietly as the students were composing a poem with their teacher. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly.
The teacher frowned and passed him by. No kids, however, could offer her a solution. Finally she glared at Johnny and called on him.
Johnny put on his devlish grin and said, "An F-word that rhymes with duck is.... fluctuation."
The teacher blurted out, "No Johnny, that's suскs! I'm so sick of telling you what a little frigging a**hole you are!"
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School Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Kids Jokes Animal Jokes Student jokes
Little Johnny wasn't a very good at speller.
One day, during a spelling exam, the teacher wrote the word "new" on the blackboard.
"Now," she asked Johnny, "what word would we have if we placed a "K" in the front?"
After thinking a few seconds, Johnny said, "Canoe?"
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School Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Communication Jokes
Teacher:
"In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia?"
Pupil:
"Holding up the telegraph lines!"
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School Jokes Military Jokes Russian Jokes Phone jokes
They wanted something long and hard.....
I gave them MY HOMEWORK!
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School Jokes Dirty jokes
Teacher:
“Why are you late?”
Boy:
“Because of a sign down the road.”
Teacher:
“What does a sign have to do with your being late?”
Boy:
“The sign said, ‘School Ahead, Go Slow!’”
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School Jokes
Why did the mean teacher walk around with her purse open?
She'd read there was going to be some change in the weather.
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School Jokes Money jokes Weather jokes
Qoctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm the school веll.
Take These tablets and if they don't work give me a ring in the morning.
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Office and Work Jokes School Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes
What vegetables to librarians like?
Quiet peas.
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School Jokes
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