Chuck Norris

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If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.

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Chuck Norris walked into the gold and silver раwn shop in Las Vegas.
They made a deal.
Chuck now owns the shop.

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Chuck Norris was once part of a knock knock joke.
The Joke ended abruptly when after the first knock the door blew up killing the man behind it.

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Years ago Chuck Norris set up a simple little home network and gave it a name.
It's called the internet.

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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just маsтurватing.

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Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.

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R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.

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Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.

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Chuck Norris was worshipped as a god by the Eskimos.
That is why they had igloos modeled after his signature move.

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Chuck Norris won the Nascar season, he was driving a bike.

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Chuck Norris doesn't worry about high gas prices.
His vehicles run on fear.

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It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.

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Chuck Norris actually died 10 years ago.
The grim reaper just hasn't summed up enough courage to face Chuck Norris.

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If you want a list of Chuck Norri's enemies, just check the extinct species list.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear?
Chuck Norris has more chest hair.

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You know the Roman Empire, well how do you think it fell?
Chuck Norris

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There was once a ship that wouldn't let chuck norris on board. It is now known as titanic

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Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight. The knife lost.

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