Kids jokes, Toddler Jokes, Children jokes

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.'
The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'.
Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.
Her husband responds, "But they are twins.
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

1

Chuck Norris was an only child.
Eventually.

1

Most babies born today are very young.

1

They said the baby looked like me.
Until they turned him the right way up.

22

Why do two skunks argue?
Because they like to kick up a stink.

23

I hate lying to my parents, but it is for their own good

1

How do children in Baghdad do?
Bombastically.

25

What did the big turnip say to the little turnip
When did you turn up?

30

Where does your nose go, when it gets hungry?
Booger King!!!

30

What did the elephant do when he hurt his toe?
He called a toe truck.

34

When does a pedophile go to sleep?
When the big hand touches the small one.

35

What did the adding machine say to the cashier?
You can count on me.

41

How did the sand get wet?
The sea weed!

42

Why did the cat sleep with a fan on?
He wanted to be a cool cat.

44

What do you say when you meet a two-headed monster?
Hello, hello.

45

What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?
Put them in a barking lot.

45

A man and his son went into a store.
The kid picked a USA flag and told his dad:
"Dad, I want this flag."
The man tells him:
"Nah, this looks too bright. Check if it's available in a different color."

48

My kids get along great when they're sleeping.

50

I saw a girl crying, so I asked her "Where are your parents?" and she started crying even more.
Man, I love working at the orphanage.

56