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Latest Jokes

Q: What would it be a good idea for you to do after a man takes your wife?
A: Let him keep her!

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Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes

A bill collector came to my house the other day, so I gave him a huge stack of old bills.

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Office and Work Jokes Money jokes

"Are you two twins?"
"No, why do you ask?"
"Because mommy dressed you both in the same clothes."
"OK that's enough, your driver's license please."

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Car and driving jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Police Officer Jokes Communication Jokes

Q: What sports team is the least safe around children?
A: The Nashville Predators.

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Sports Jokes Kids Jokes

Recently, I woke up to find that two of my car's tires had been stolen. When the police officer arrived, he asked, "When were you last driving the car?"
"Last night at 11:00," I said.
"And the tires were on it then?"

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Car and driving jokes Police Officer Jokes Stupid Jokes

The clerk walks into the boss's office and says,
"The auditors have just left, sir."
"Have they finished checking the books?", asks the boss.
"Very thoroughly," is the reply.
"Well, what did they say", says the boss.
"They want 15% to keep quiet."

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Office and Work Jokes Money jokes Management Jokes Accountant Jokes Superhero Jokes Boss Jokes

My aunt died, God bless her, at a ripe old age of 104.
We called her Aunt Tique.

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Marriage and Family Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Old People Jokes Communication Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Q: Why was Pavlov's hair so soft?
A: Classical conditioning.

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Science jokes Geek jokes Nerd jokes

After twelve years of carrying books to school, you're well prepared for a career in backpacking.

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Office and Work Jokes School Jokes Graduation Jokes

Happy Father's Day!
I got you a present but if you want to get technical then technically you bought it.
By the way, can I borrow $20?

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Money jokes Kids Jokes Make My Day Laughs Father's Day Jokes

A guy's talking to a girl in a bar. He asks her, "What's your name?"
She says, "Carmen."
He says, "That's a nice name. Who named you, your mother?"
She says, "No, I named myself."
He says, "Why Carmen?"
She says, "Because I like cars and I like men. What's your name?"
He says, "Beerfuck."

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Car and driving jokes Dirty jokes Men jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Sex Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes Beer Jokes

A man took a trip out West after a harrowing divorce proceeding. He stopped in a bar, and after a few drinks, stated to no one in particular, "Lawyers are horses' аssеs."
One of the locals spoke up on hearing this said, "Mister, you'd better watch what you say. You're in horse country."

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Divorce Jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes Vulgar jokes Lawyer Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes

Yo mama so old that when she went to the museum, people thought she was part of an exhibit.

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Old People Jokes Yo Momma Jokes

A teacher cautiously approaches the subject of sеx education with her fourth grade class because she realizes Little Johnny's propensity for sеxuаl innuendo.
But Johnny remains attentive throughout the entire lecture.
Finally, towards the end of the lesson, the teacher asks for examples of sеx education from the class.
One little boy raises his hand, "I saw a bird in her nest with some eggs." "Very good, William," cooed the teacher.
"My mommy had a baby," said little Esther.
"Oh, that's nice," replied the teacher.
Finally, little Johnny raises his hand.
With much fear and trepidation, the teacher calls on him.
"I was watchin' TV yesterday, and I saw the Lone Ranger. He was surrounded by hundreds and hundreds of Indians. And they all attacked at one time. And he killed every one of them with his two guns."
The teacher was relieved but puzzled, "And what does that have to do with sеx education, Johnny?"
"It'll teach those Indians not to fuск with the Lone Ranger."

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School Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Sex Jokes Cowboys and Indians Jokes

A woman asked her lover, "Would you keep fuск me that much even after marriage?
He replied, "Sure dear, if your husband had no objection."

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Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Dirty jokes

Yo mama's so fат that when she wore a red shirt, people said hey look koolaid.

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Yo Momma Jokes Fat Jokes

What did the Left Nut say to the right nut?
Don't talk to the guy in the middle he's a diск!...

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Dirty jokes

Chuck Norris teaches math to solve its own problems.

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School Jokes Chuck Norris Jokes Math Jokes

A teacher asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favourite Bible stories.
She was puzzled by a boy's picture which showed four people on an aircraft, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent.
'The flight to Egypt,' he replied.
'I see...
And that must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus,' she said.
'But who's the fourth person?'
'Oh, that's Pontius – the Pilot!'

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School Jokes Pilot Jokes Aviation Jokes Bible Jokes Catholic Jokes

Patient: Doc I keep on forgetting things.
Doctor: Since when did you have these problems?
Patient: What problems?

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Life Jokes