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The Captain called the Sergeant in.
"Sarge, I just got a telegram that Smith's mother died yesterday.
Better go tell him and send him in to see me."
So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation and lines up all the troops.
"Listen up, men," says the Sergeant. "Johnson report to Personnel to sign some papers.
The rest of you men report to the Motor Pool for maintenance.
Oh by the way, Smith, your mother died, report to the commander."
Later that day the Captain called the Sergeant into his office.
"Hey, Sarge, that was a pretty cold way to inform Smith his mother died.
Couldn't you be a bit more tactful, next time?"
"Yes, sir," answered the Sarge.
A few months later, the Captain called the Sergeant in again with, "Sarge, I just got a telegram that James mother died.
You'd better go tell him and send him in to see me.
This time be more tactful."
So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation.
"Ok, men, fall in and listen up."
"Everybody with a mother, take two steps forward."
"Not so fast, James!"
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A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu.
“I’m sorry, sir, but I am blind and can’t read the menu. Just bring me a dirтy fork from a previous customer. I’ll smell it and order from there.”
A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirтy dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man’s table and hands it to him. The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath. “Ah, yes, that’s what I’ll have - meatloaf and mashed potatoes.”
Unbelievable, the owner thinks as he walks towards the kitchen. Sheryl, the cook happens to be the owner’s wife. He tells her what had just happened. The blind man eats his meal and leaves.
Several days later, the blind man returns and the owner mistakenly brings him a menu again.
“Sir, remember me? I’m the blind man.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t recognize you. I’ll go get you a dirтy fork.” The owner retrieves a dirтy fork and brings it to the blind man.
After another deep breath, the blind man says, “That smells great. I’ll take the macaroni and cheese with broccoli.” Walking away in disbelief, the owner thinks the blind man is sсrеwing around with him and tells his wife Sheryl that the next time the blind man comes in he’s going to test him. The blind man eats and leaves.
He returns the following week, but this time the owner sees him coming and runs to the kitchen. He tells his wife, “Sheryl, put this fork down your раnтiеs and rub it all around before I take it to the blind man.”
Sheryl complies and hands her husband the fork.
As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner is ready and waiting. “Good afternoon, sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you.”
The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff, and says, “Hey I didn’t know that Sheryl worked here…”
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