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Latest Jokes

Q: What did the apple say to the worm?
A: You're boring me.

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Food Jokes Animal Jokes

Q: What do you call an empty jar of Cheez Whiz?
A: Cheez Whuz.

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Food Jokes

You only get laid once, you only get hard once, and when you DO finally get hard, it takes under three minutes and you're already in hot water.

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Food Jokes

- You can GET chocolate.
- Chocolate satisfies even when it's gone soft.
- You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.
- You can have chocolate in in public.
- If you bite the nuts, the chocolate won't mind.
- The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate.
- You don't get hairs in your mouth with chocolate.
- No need to fake your enjoyment of chocolate.
- Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.
- You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
- You are never too young or too old for chocolate.
- Size doesn't matter - though more is still better.

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Food Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Chocolate Jokes

Q: What's the difference between вееr nuts and deer nuts?
A: Вееr nuts are $1.39, and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Food Jokes Animal Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Beer Jokes

Q: Why did the fат turkey cross the road?
A: To get hit by my car.

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Food Jokes Car and driving jokes

Q: What did the sergeant tomato say to the slacker tomato?
A: "You better ketchup!"

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Food Jokes Military Jokes

Q: What do tofu and a dildо have in common?
A: They are both meat substitutes.

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Food Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Masturbation jokes

A diner complained, "Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
His waiter replied, "That's entirely possible; our cook used to be a tailor."

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Food Jokes Life Jokes

Q: What's yellow and goes up and down?
A: A banana in an elevator.

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Food Jokes Kids Jokes

A Rolls Royce pulls up in to an expensive restaurant. A sheik emerges, followed by a harem of women and a rooster. After ordering for himself and his harem, the sheik requests a basket of apples for the rooster.
The rooster proceeds to eats three baskets of apples. The waiter asks the sheik about the voracious appetite of the rooster.
The sheik explains, "A genie granted me three wishes. My first wish was to have an endless supply of money. My second wish was to have many beautiful women. And my third wish was to have an insatiable соск."

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Food Jokes Jokes about Women Car and driving jokes Money jokes Restaurant Jokes

The Dove Bar's like an 80-pound wаd of chocolate on a toothpick.
If you're not careful when you take it out of the package, you'll snap your wrists.

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Food Jokes Chocolate Jokes

Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies?
A: A rotisserie chicken.

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Food Jokes Animal Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Q: What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of peanut butter?
A: A соск that sticks to the roof of your mouth.

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Food Jokes Animal Jokes

Q. What do you get when you cross a rooster and a lollipop?
A: A c**ksucker.

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Food Jokes Men jokes

A man visits his doctor with celery stalks stuck in each ear and a carrot stick up each nostril.
He mumbles, "Doc, I'm just not feeling well."
The doctor replies, "Maybe you're not eating right."

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Food Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Men jokes

A tourist on a farm asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg.
The farmer said, "That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw."
"So why does he have a wooden leg?" the tourist asked.
"One night, our house caught on fire, and he came inside and woke us all up."
The tourist asked again, "So, why does that pig have a wooden leg?"
"You can't eat a pig that brave all at once!"

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Food Jokes Animal Jokes

Q: Where do one-legged people eat?
A: IHOP.

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Food Jokes Dark Humor Jokes

Q: What do you call two banana peels?
A: A pair of slippers.

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Food Jokes

Knock, knock.
Who's there?Banana.Banana who?Knock, knock.Who's there? Banana.Banana who?Knock, knock.Who's there? Banana.Banana who? Knock, knock.Who's there? Orange.Orange who?Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Food Jokes