Beauty Jokes - Page 6

Two young men from up in Minnesota were looking at a Sears catalog and admiring the models.
Ole says to the Sven "Have you seen the beautiful girls in this catalog?"
Sven replies, "Yes, they are very beautiful. And look at the price!"
Ole says, with wide eyes, "Wow, they aren’t very expensive. At this price, I’m buying one.”
Sven smiles and pats him on the back, "Good idea! Order one and if she’s as beautiful as she is in the catalog, I will get one too."
Three weeks later, Sven asks his friend Ole, "Did you ever receive the girl you ordered from the Sears catalog?"
Ole replies, "No, but it shouldn’t be long now. I got her clothes yesterday!"

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Q: You know why women haven't landed on the moon?
A: Because there is no shopping centre.

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Jokes about Women Beauty Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes

Q: What does Frosty's wife put on her face at night?
A: Cold cream!

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Beauty Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes

Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

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Christmas Jokes Beauty Jokes

The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings.

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Jokes about Women Beauty Jokes

Excuse me? Do you work at Little Ceasars? Cuz Ur Hot And I'm Ready.

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Office and Work Jokes Beauty Jokes

I live in constant fear that my kid will become a famous artist or painter and I will have thrown out about a trillion dollars of her work.

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Office and Work Jokes Kids Jokes Beauty Jokes

Q: What do blondes eat to increase their вrеаsт size?
A: Silicone сhiрs.

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Blonde Jokes Food Jokes Beauty Jokes Stupid Jokes

Nothing beats a woman with a beautiful singing voice.
Except for Chris Brown.

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Beauty Jokes Jokes about Women Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Music and Musician Jokes

Wearing a turtleneck shirt is like being strangled by a really weak person all day.

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Beauty Jokes

A man is in a mall and sees a clothes store.
He sees a magnificent, brand new jacket in the shop window and decides he shall try it on and buy it.
So he walks into the shop and asks an employee:
"Excuse me sir."
"How can I help you" the employee replies.
"Could I by any chance try on that jacket in your shop window?"
The employee looks at him and says "No you shall not you are to try it on in the changing rooms like everybody else!"

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Beauty Jokes Men jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes

In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love.
In college it means someone is too drunк to stand on their own.

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Beauty Jokes School Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes College jokes Love Jokes

I don't understand why I'm single my hobbies include smelling my own hair and bragging about how I'm immune to bats.

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Beauty Jokes Single People Jokes

Wife comes out of a beauty salon and asks husband:
"So, how do I look?"
"Well, at least you tried..."

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Beauty Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes

Two attorneys were walking out of a bar and a beautiful young lady walks by.
One attorney turns to his associate and comments "Boy, I would like to fuск her!
The other attorney thinks for a second and said "Out of what"?

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Bar and Bartender Jokes Sex Jokes Lawyer Jokes Beauty Jokes

A man's wife asks him to go to the store to buy her cigarettes.
He walks there only to find it closed.
So, he goes into a nearby bar to use their vending machine.
At the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her.
They have a couple of beers and eventually end up in her apartment.
After they've had some fun, he realizes it's 3 a.m. and says, "My wife's going to кill me. Do you have any talcum powder?"
The woman gives him some talcum powder, which he rubs on his hands and then goes home.
His wife is waiting for him in the doorway and screeches, "Where the hеll have you been?!"
"Well, honey, it's like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking chick there, we had a few drinks, one thing led to another, and I ended up in bed with her."
"Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!"
She sees his hands are covered with powder and says, "You liar! You went bowling again!"

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Men jokes Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Beauty Jokes Beer Jokes

Little Lucy met Little Johnny after school and ask him, "Johnny do you you think I'm cute?"
Little Johnny looked at her from head to toe irritably and replied.
"Roses are red.
Your blood is too.
You look like a monkey.
And belong in a zoo.
Do not worry, I'll be there too.
Not in the cage, But laughing at you".

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Little Johnny Jokes School Jokes Kids Jokes Funny Poems Beauty Jokes

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks.
After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini.
After he finishes that it, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini.
The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill."
The customer replies, "I'm peeking at a photo of my wife.
When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home."

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Business jokes Bar and Bartender Jokes Beauty Jokes

We're hoping Chuck Norris doesn't go bald on top.
It's a bad look with his mullet.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Beauty Jokes

Patient:
"Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I do?"
Dentist:
"Wear a brown tie..."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Dentist Jokes Beauty Jokes