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Jewish Jokes

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Еврейски момък ме покани на среща. Попита ме за номера ми. Имах среща с еврейско девойче. Излизах с еврейка на среща и тя ме попита за номера ми. Аз и казах че ние имаме имена ... J'ai eu un rencard avec une juive et elle m'a demandé mon numéro... Je lui ai répondu que nous, on a des noms! I met a Jewish girl today and she asked for my number I told her we use names here ATTENTION HUMOUR TRÈS NOIR! Veuillez ne pas crié au retour d'Hitler après cette blague : Tu est toujours là? T'a du courage alors voilà mon histoire: Un jour j'ai eu un rencard avec une juive, elle...
A while ago I had a blind date with a Jewish girl
She asked me for my number.
I told her that we usually use names.
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Vad säger den judiske pedofilen för något? Finns det några barn som skulle vilja köpa lite godis? - Что сказал еврей-педофил маленькой девочке? - Ты купишь мне конфетку? - Τί λέει ένας Εβραίος παιδεραστής σε ένα πιτσιρίκι; - Αγοράκι θα μου αγοράσεις ένα γλειφιτζούρι; Har du hørt om den pedofile jøden som traff to smågutter? - Vil dere kjøpe litt godteri...? Židovský pedofil potká v parku malou holčičku a povídá jí: "Holčičko, nechceš si koupit bonbón?" Was sagt ein pädophiler Jude zu einem kleinen Jungen? Möchtest du ein Bonbon………. Kaufen?
What do Jewish pedophiles say?
“Hey kid, want to buy some candy?”
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A waiter walks up to a table full of Jewish women dining
And says "ladies, is anything ok?"
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Why haven't I ever met a full blooded jew?
All of the ones I've met have just been Jew-ish
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Еврейски момък ме покани на среща. Попита ме за номера ми. Имах среща с еврейско девойче. Излизах с еврейка на среща и тя ме попита за номера ми. Аз и казах че ние имаме имена ... J'ai eu un rencard avec une juive et elle m'a demandé mon numéro... Je lui ai répondu que nous, on a des noms! A while ago I had a blind date with a Jewish girl She asked me for my number. I told her that we usually use names. ATTENTION HUMOUR TRÈS NOIR! Veuillez ne pas crié au retour d'Hitler après cette blague : Tu est toujours là? T'a du courage alors voilà mon histoire: Un jour j'ai eu un rencard avec une juive, elle...
I met a Jewish girl today and she asked for my number
I told her we use names here
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A teacher asks the class, “What are some examples of flammable objects?” and the Jewish student raises his hand.
The teacher replies, “Very good! Any other examples?”
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How do they play Pokemon Go in Gaza Sтriр?
They grab a round rock from the ground and say:
"Pick-a-jew"!
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How do you get a Jew to win a race?
Drop a quarter at the finish line.
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No matter who wins the presidential election, it will be historic.
We'll either have the first female president, the first Jewish president, the first Canadian president, or the last president.
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Why are circumsized pe-nises so popular among Jewish girls?
They love anything that's 15% off
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A Jew, a German and an American walked into a small room. The Jew never came out.
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The 3 shortest books ever written are:
Polish Wisdom
Jewish Business Ethics
Black Guys I Met While Yachting
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An Arab and a Jew stand in front of a Нiтlеr statue.
The Jew spits on the statue.
Arab: why did you do that?
Jew: because he killed half my people.
The Arab spits on the statue as well.
Jew: why did you do that?
Arab: because he didn't кill the other half.
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Whats the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew?
Harry made it out of the Chamber
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An old Jewish beggar was out on the street, begging with his tin cup.
A man passed by and the beggar said to the man, "Sir, could you spare 3 cents for a cup of coffee?"
And the man said,
"Where do get coffee for 3 cents?"
And the beggar said,
"Who buys retail?"
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What do you call a old snowman?
Water.
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I bought a Jewish sports car.
Not only will it stop on a dime, it will pick it up too.
I've heard they're gas guzzlers though.
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Q: How do you кill 1000 Jews at once?
A: Throw a dollar off a cliff.
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Q: How do you fit 60,000 Jews in a minivan?
A: With a dustpan.
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Q: What's worse than holocaust?
A: 6M Jews.
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