Men jokes

Most popular in this category
Men jokes Irish jokes
Men jokes Business jokes
A group from Chicago spent a weekend gambling in Las Vegas.
One of the men on that trip won $100,000.
He didn't want anyone to know about it, so he decided not to return with the others, but took a later plane home - arriving back 3 a. M.
He immediately went out to the backyard of his house, dug a hole and planted the money in it.
The following morning he walked outside and found only an empty hole.
He noticed footsteps leading from the hole to the house next door, which was owned by a deaf-mute.
On the same street lived a professor who understood sign language and was a friend of the deaf man.
Grabbing his pistol, the enraged man went to awaken the professor and dragged him to the deaf man's house.
"You tell this guy that if he doesn't give me back my $100,000 I'm going to кill him!" he screamed at the professor.
The professor conveyed the message to his friend, and his friend replied in sign language, "I hid it in my backyard, underneath the cherry tree."
The professor turned to the man with the gun and said,
"He's not going to tell you.
He said he'd rather die first."
Sports Jokes Money jokes Men jokes Friendship Jokes
A Bible group study leader says to his group, “What would you do if you knew you only had four weeks left before the great Judgment Day?” A gentleman says, ”I would go out into my community and minister the Gospel to those that have not yet accepted the Lord into their lives.”
“Very good!” says the group leader. One lady speaks up and says enthusiastically, “I would dedicate all of my remaining time to serving God, my family, my church, and my fellow man with a greater conviction.”
“That's wonderful!” the group leader comments. One gentleman in the back finally speaks up loudly and says, “I would go to my mother-in-laws house for the four weeks.” The group leader asks, “Why your mother-in-law’s home?”
“Because that will make it the longest four weeks of my life!”
Religion jokes Marriage and Family Jokes God Jokes Men jokes
Marriage and Family Jokes Men jokes Friendship Jokes Communication Jokes
DER ULTIMATIVE LIEBES-TEST Наистина най-добрият приятел на човека е кучето. Действительно лучший друг человека - собака. Не верите? Попробуйте такой эксперимент:Закройте в багажнике машины вместе собаку и свою жену. ЗА ДА СЕ УВЕРИШ КОЙ ТЕ ОБИЧА НАИСТИНА, проведи следния експеримент: - Kto jest najlepszym przyjacielem mężczyzny - żona czy pies? - Zamknij oboje w bagażniku, po godzinie otwórz i zobacz, kto się będzie cieszył, że znowu Cię widzi. Si quieres conocer el amor verdadero, haz este experimento. El Instituto de Salud "Carlos III" sigue investigando temas sanitarios, en este caso, en colaboración con importantes cientificos han... Test de fidelitate: 1. Ia cainele si nevasta si baga-i in portbagaj. 2. Lasa-i acolo 2 ore. 3. Vezi cine se bucura ca te vede! Att hunden e mannens bästa vän, bevisas med att låsa in en hund å sin fru i bagaget på bilen, å sen vänta 3 timmar och där efter låsa upp för att se vem som e gladast! A kutya tényleg az ember legjobb barátja. Ha nem hiszed el, próbáld ki a következőt: Zárd be a kutyádat és a feleségedet a kocsid csomagtartójába. Egy óra múlva nyisd ki! Ki örül neked jobban,... Дійсно найкращий друг людини - собака. Не вірите? Спробуйте здійснити такий експеримент: Закрийте в багажнику машини разом собаку і свою дружину. Через годину-другу відкрийте. Хто, на вашу думку,...
Men jokes Friendship Jokes Relationship Jokes Dog jokes
Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it. "
So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts, "Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical.
After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says.
"President Clinton," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yes," Bubba says,
"I know him, let's fly out to Washington."
And off they go.
At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.
After they leave the White house grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Bubba.
"My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time."
So off they fly to Rome.
Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says,
"This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope." And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.
Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony.
But by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, "What happened?"
His boss looks up and says,
"I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said,
"Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?"
Office and Work Jokes Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Men jokes Friendship Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Boss Jokes Coffee Jokes American Presidents Humor
An Irish man went to confession in St. Patrick’s Catholic Church.
‘Father’, he confessed, ‘it has been one month since my last confession. I had sеx with Fаnny Green twice last month.’
The priest told the sinner, ‘You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary’s.’
Soon thereafter, another Irish man entered the confessional. ‘Father,
It has been two months since my last confession. I’ve had sеx with Fаnny Green twice a week for the past two months.’
This time, the priest questioned, ‘Who is this Fаnny Green?’
‘A new woman in the neighborhood,’ the sinner replied.
‘Very well,’ sighed the priest. Go and say ten Hail Mary’s.;
At mass the next morning, as the priest prepared to deliver the sermon,
A tall, voluptuous, drop-dead gorgeous redheaded woman entered the sanctuary.
The eyes of every man in the church fell upon her as she slowly sashayed up the aisle and sat down right in front of the priest. Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching, shiny emerald-green shoes.
The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to realize she wasn’t wearing any underwear.
The priest turned to the altar boy and whispered, ‘Is that Fаnny Green?’
The bug-eyed altar boy couldn’t believe his ears but managed to calmly reply, ‘No Father, I think it’s just a reflection from her shoes’
Jokes about Women Men jokes Sex Jokes Irish jokes Priest Jokes
Две блондинки си говорят: Sagt eine Blondine zur anderen: "Rauchst Du nach dem Sex immer?" Deux secrétaires papotent pendant une pause. La première demande à l'autre: Treffen sich 2 Nutten, sagt die eine: "Sag mal, rauchst Du auch immer hinterher?" Sagt die andere: "Weiss nicht, muss ich mal nachgucken." Frägt die Frau ihre blonde Freundin: "Sag mal, rauchst du eigentlich nach dem Sex?" Meint die blonde Freundin: "Du, ich weiß es gar nicht! Ich hab noch nie nachgeschaut!" Deux blondes discutent de leurs façon de faire l'amour. Pour terminer l'une d'elles demande à l'autre : - Qu'est ce que tu fais toi après l'amour ? L'autre lui répond : - Je fume. Et toi ? - Ah je... Tu fumes après l'amour ? - Je sais pas j'ai jamais regardé !
Jokes about Women Men jokes Sex Jokes