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Most Popular Jokes

Q: Why did the woman get thrown out of the riding stable?
A: She wanted to mount the horse her way.

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Jokes about Women Animal Jokes

A guy was walking along the street when he saw a crowd of people running towards him.
He stopped one of the runners and asked, "What’s happening?"
The runner replied breathlessly, "A lion has escaped from the zoo."
"Oh my, which way is it heading?"
"Well you don’t think we are chasing it, do you?"

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Animal Jokes

A guy goes into a store and tells the clerk, "I’d like some Polish sausage."
The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"
The guy, clearly offended, says, “"Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Would ya, huh? Would ya?"
The clerk says, "Well, no."
With deep self-righteous ndignation, the guy says, "Well, all right then, why did you ask me if I’m Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?"
The clerk replies, "Because this is Home Depot."

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Jewish Jokes Mexican jokes Dog jokes

A mother noticed her little dauther praying.
"Please, God," the little girl kept saying.
"Bless my father and my mother and make Melaka the capital city of Malaysia."
"Why did you make such as strange request?" the mother asked.
"Beacause that's what I wrote in my Geography test this morning!"

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School Jokes Kids Jokes God Jokes

Q: What's the difference between hockey player and hippie girl?
A: Hockey player will take shower after 3 periods.

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Sports Jokes Gross Jokes

They say the surest way to a man's heart is through the stomach.
But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.

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Dark Humor Jokes Food Jokes Men jokes Love Jokes

Q: Why are farmers cooler than Hipsters?
A: Farmers can go a day without their Pitchfork

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Hipster Jokes Office and Work Jokes

Q: Why do we have to be quiet in church?
A: Because people are sleeping!

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Church jokes

I'm not usually one to tell someone how to do their job, which is probably why my promotion to management only lasted a week.

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Management Jokes Office and Work Jokes

What do you get when you put root вееr in a square glass?
Beer.

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Geek jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Math Jokes Beer Jokes

Doctor (to a patient): "You must take four tea-spoonfuls of this medicine before every meal."
Patient: "Doctor, we’ve only 3 spoons at home."

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Medical and Doctor Jokes

Маdоnnа is 54 and her boyfriend's 25, Jennifer Lopez is 43 and her boyfriend's 26, so if you're single its ok, maybe he's just not born yet.

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Celebrity and Pop Culture Jokes Single People Jokes Life Jokes

Q: What did the fire monster that was slayed by the water monster say?
A: "You're cold."

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Communication Jokes

Why wouldn't the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone?
He desperately wanted a scoop.

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Food Jokes

Women are looking for Mr. Right.
Men are looking for Ms. Right Now.

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Men vs Women Jokes Jokes about Women Men jokes Life Jokes

An ideal man doesn't drink, doesn't snore, doesn't watch football, doesn't argue and DOESNT'T EXIST.

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Men jokes Life Jokes

How many Mafia hitmen does it take to light the bonfire?
Three, One to set fire to the effigy, one to watch his back, and one to shoot any witnesses.

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Life Jokes

Define "Egghead":
What Mrs. Dumpty gives to Humpty.

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Life Jokes

Yo momma's so fат...
The animals at the zoo feed her.

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Yo Momma Jokes Animal Jokes Fat Jokes

A blonde and her boyfriend are going through they're daily routine in the bathroom when there's a knock at the door.
The boyfriend who is in the shower tells the blonde to go answer the door.
The blonde puts on a towel and goes to the door.
A man is standing there, and says "Hey hun, do me a favor."
"What?" askes the blonde.
"Drop the towel and I'll give you $500!." replied the man.
The blonde drops her towel and jiggles her тiтs for the man at the door.
"Thanks, a ton hun, i'll catch you later" says the man and he hands her the $500.
The blonde walks back smilling to her boyfriend who had just got out of the shower.
As he steps out, he says "Hey hun?
I just thought I'd let you know John will be stopping by to pay me back that $500 he owes me!"

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Pet Jokes Money jokes Blonde Jokes Men jokes Boob Jokes