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Latest Jokes

Warning Signs that you Might Need a Different Lawyer
Your lawyer tells you that his last good case was of Budweiser.
When the prosecutors see your lawyer, they high-five each other.
Your lawyer picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."
Your lawyer tells you that he has never told a lie.
A prison guard is shaving your head.

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Lawyer Jokes

Canadian joke my dad used to tell me, wanted to see if it translates well...
Phillip: What did the Spanish priest say to the Iranian gynecologist?
Terrance: I don't know Phillip
Phillip: *Farts*

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Spanish jokes Canadian jokes Gynecology Jokes Priest Jokes

I was walking passed a farm and a sign said ‘Duck, eggs’.
I thought, that’s an unnecessary comma. And then it hit me.

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Duck jokes

My uncle runs a clinic inside a hotel in Spain
He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.
Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician

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Spanish jokes Hotel Jokes

My wife said she would leave me if I didn't stop making Pokémon references...
'You need to make a choice' she said 'It's either me or the sтuрid pokémon references!'
'I understand', I replied, holding back tears. 'Sandra, I choose you!!!'

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Pokémon jokes

It is my first time in court and I heard the judge shouting, "Order!!"
So I replied fried chicken, mac and cheese and cola. Now I'm being escorted out by two officers. I think we are going to a restaurant.

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Cheese jokes Restaurant Jokes

If there is an elephant in the room and nobody notices
Is it irrelephant?

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Elephant jokes

You shouldn't call short people "midgets".
It isn't the right gnomenclature.

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Short people jokes

A frog decided to trace his genealogy one day...
He discovered he was a tad Polish.

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Polish jokes

(OC) What do you call Helen Keller punching someone?
Senseless violence.

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Helen Keller Jokes

I got caught cheating on my physics exam. Furious, my professor said to me "I hope you understand the gravity of the situation".
But if I had known that, I wouldn't be in this situation in the first place.

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Physics jokes Cheating Jokes

What do you call 6.02*10^23 butts?
Molasses

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What do you call jokes

One соw asks another соw, “Are you afraid of mad соw disease?” The other соw says, “Why should I be? I’m a helicopter.”

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Cow jokes

Drug-sniffing dog
Me:
"Sweet dog you got there"
Policeman:
"Yes, this is our new drug-sniffing dog."
Me:
"Still in training, huh?"
Policeman:
"What do you mean?"
Me:
"Nevermind"

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Dog jokes

Where would you park your camel?
The Camelot.
PS Вооzе helped with this and now I'm laughing alone in my apartment
Edit: Went to class, came back, saw this. Me and my cat are thoroughly pleased.

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Cat jokes Superhero Jokes

Good friends don't let you do dumb things......................... Alone

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Dark Humor Jokes Friendship Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

What do you call a dinosaur who lost their gold?
A dinosr

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Dinosaur jokes

My crush rejected me for being a math nerd
I was 2² to ask her out

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Nerd jokes

Why are so many Italian men named Tony?
When they ship them over from the Old Country, they stamp "To N. Y." on them...

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Italian Jokes

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Toothy!
Toothy who?
Toothy the day after Monday!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Torch!
Torch who?
Torch you'd never ask!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Toronto!
Toronto who?
Toronto be a law against Knock Knock
Jokes!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Toucan!
Toucan who?
Toucan play at this game!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Toyota!
Toyota who?
Toyata be a law against such awful jokes!

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Monday jokes