Skip to main content

  • Home
  • Categories
  • Popular
  • Funny pictures
  • Most Popular Jokes
  • Latest Jokes
  • Jokes about Women
  • Religion jokes
  • Office and Work Jokes
  • Gross Jokes
  • Sports Jokes
  • School Jokes
  • Marriage and Family Jokes
  • Kids Jokes
  • Medical and Doctor Jokes
  • Dark Humor Jokes
  • Blonde Jokes
  • Animal Jokes
  • Dirty jokes
  • Chuck Norris Jokes
  • Donald Trump Jokes
  • Drinking and Drunk Jokes
  • Putin Jokes
  • Sex Jokes
  • Christmas Jokes
  • Jewish Jokes
  • Police Officer Jokes
  • Weed Jokes
  • Old People Jokes
  • Mother-in-Law Jokes
  • Masturbation jokes
  • Political Jokes
  • Vulgar jokes
  • Genie jokes
  • Aviation Jokes
  • Nurse jokes
  • Psychology and Psychiatry Jokes
  • Knock-knock jokes
  • Scottish Jokes
  • Soccer Jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Dad Jokes
  • Gynecology Jokes
  • Rude Jokes
Български Stupid Jokes Dumme Witze Chistes tontos Русский Français Barzellette Demenziali Ελληνικά Глупави вицеви Türkçe Анекдоти про дуже дурні речі Português Głupie dowcipy Svenska Domme grappen Dansk Norsk Hölmöläisvitsit Magyar Româna Čeština Lietuvių Latviešu Glupi Vicevi
My Jokes Edit Profile Logout
  1. Home
  2. Stupid Jokes

Stupid Jokes

Most popular in this category
Three blondes are stranded on an island.
A fairy comes along and says that she will grant each person a wish.
So the first blonde says she wants to be really smart so she digs and finds a cell phone and calls the Army.
The second blonde says that she wants to be even smarter so she finds a flair and sets it off.
The third blonde says that she wants to be even smarter than both of them, so the fairy changes her hair color to black and she says,"Let's go over the bridge."
78 0
0
Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes Phone jokes Military Jokes
During a break on a North Dakota office building project, one of the construction workers approached Pyle.
"Ah heard the boys is gonna strike," he said.
"What fer?" asked Pyle.
"Shorter hours."
"Good fer them!" said the redneck.
"Ah always did think sixty minutes was too long fer an hour!"
72 0
0
Redneck jokes Office and Work Jokes Stupid Jokes
While reading the newspaper, Walter came across an article about a beautiful actress and model who married a boxer who was not noted for his IQ.
"I'll never understand," he said to his wife, "why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives."
His wife replied: "Thank you, dear!"
83 0
0
- Странно, что у самых больших дураков самые красивые жены! - сказал муж. - Много странно, най-красивите жени се женят за глупаци A man was reading the newspaper during breakfast and said to his wife, "Look at this. Another beautiful actress is going to marry a baseball player who's a total dope! Mann: "Es ist doch immer wieder erstaunlich, dass die hübschesten Mädchen die größten Idioten heiraten."
Marriage and Family Jokes Jokes about Women Men jokes Beauty Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes
Suzy asked her big sister Samantha how babies are made. Samantha explains it to her.
"I still don't get it? Can you show me."
Suzy says.
"OK. Tonight, I will let you watch will my boyfriend, Jack and I sсrеw."
That night, Jack laid Samantha 5 times but Suzy still didn't understand.
The next night Jack was tired of Suzy watching so he offered to have sеx with her.
"OK but I don't want Samantha to watch"
So Samantha went outside.
They are in there for almost an hour and when they come out Jack is smiling like crazy.
"That was fun but I still don't get it."
Says Suzy
The next day the same thing happened.
And the next day.
Finally 2 weeks later Samantha comes home crying.
"Whats wrong," Suzy says.
"Jack dumped me. He said there was someone better."
Said Samantha.
"Let's go talk to him maybe we can change his mind," said Suzy.
When they got there Jack said he made up his mind and there was nothing they could do to change it.
Then he asked to speak to Suzy privately.
He pulled off all of Suzy's clothes and started to sсrеw her.
"OK," Jack said kissing Suzy's neck "I broke up with Samantha now tell me how you got to be so good in bed."
"Fine." She replied, "I asked all my other sisters how babies are made."
79 0
0
Sex Jokes Kids Jokes Baby Jokes Stupid Jokes Military Jokes
A blonde was sick and tired of people making fun of her for being a blonde, so she decided to hang herself.
A couple minutes later two men walk by and see her hanging by her wrists.
"What are you doing." they ask her.
So she replies "Hanging myself."
The men are confused and asked "If you are hanging youself, you put the rope around your neck."
The blond says "Duh....I tried that, I couldn't breath."
38 0
0
Вълкът гледа-заекът виси, завързан с въже за краката, от едно дърво. Бесење Върви си Мечо Пух из гората. По едно време вижда Прасчо вързан с дебело въже за крака, виси от едно дърво. Блондинка решава да се беси... Back a few years ago, I went over to my neighbors house.(She was a blonde), and for some reason she was mad at the world. She had locked herself in the bathroom and was threatening suicide. A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park. A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I'm hanging myself." "You're supposed to put the noose around your neck, not... När Frode kommer hem till Odd hänger denna och dinglar i ett rep med en snara runt armen. - Vad håller du på med, undar Frode. - Jag tänkte ta livet av mej. - Då måste du ha snaran runt halsen.... O vizinho entra na casa do português e o encontra com uma corda amarrada na barriga: — O que é isso? Por que esta com esta corda amarrada na barriga? O português responde: — Vou me suicidar! — Mas... – Varför hänger du här i ett rep runt midjan? – Jag tänkte ta livet av mig så jag satte snaran runt halsen, men då kunde jag inte andas. Det är ju livsfarligt! Så jag provar med midjan istället. A blonde really got tired of all blonde jokes and decided to hang herself in the bathroom. As she locked the door, she yelled at her husband, "I'm hanging myself because I'm tired of jokes about us... Det var en gång en norrman som skulle hälsa på sin vän som bodde i Finland... När han kom dit såg han sin vän hänga med fötterna i ett rep som var knuten till ett träd.. - Vad gör du? undrar... Dans un hôpital psychiatrique, un fou engage la conversation avec un autre fou suspendu par la taille à un arbre. - Qu’est-ce que tu fais ? - Tu vois bien, je me suis pendu. - Mais, imbécile, c’est... Intr-o dupa-amiaza un padurar trece prin codrul des si deodata vede un tigan legat la mijloc cu o sfoara atarnat de o craca. Il ia imediat la intrebari: - Tigane ce faci, ma, atarnat acolo? - Uite,... När Ole kommer för att besöka Vegard så hittar han honom hängandes i ett rep runt armen. - Vad håller du på med? Undrar Ole. - Jag försöker ta livet av mej! Svarar Vegard. - Men då måste du ju ha... Egy bolond kötelet csavar a derekára, és egy faágra köti magát. Arra megy egy másik bolond, és megkérdi tőle: - Haver, te mit csinálsz ott fent? - Láthatod! Meguntam az életem, és felakasztottam... Ein Mann beobachtet zufällig, wie sein Freund auf einen Baum klettert und sich dort einen Strick um die Brust bindet. "Was machst du da?" - "Das ganze Leben kann mir gestohlen bleiben! Ich hänge...
Blonde Jokes Men jokes Sick and Death Jokes Stupid Jokes
A woman called our airline customer-service desk asking if she could take her dog on board.
"Sure," I said, "as long as you provide your own kennel."
I further explained that the kennel needed to be large enough for the dog to stand up, sit down, turn around, and roll over.
The customer was flummoxed: "I'll never be able to teach him all of that by tomorrow!"
81 0
0
Pet Jokes Animal Jokes Aviation Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Dog jokes
A photographer from a well known national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park.
When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything from ground level.
He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air.
He arrived at the airport and saw a plane warming up near the gate.
He jumped in with his bag and shouted, "Let's go!"
The pilot swung the little plane into the wind, and within minutes they were in the air.
The photographer said, "Fly over the park and make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures."
"Why?" asked the pilot.
"Because I am a photographer," he responded, "and photographers take photographs."
The pilot was silent for a moment; finally, he stammered, "You mean you're not the flight instructor?"
81 0
0
Aviation Jokes Office and Work Jokes Stupid Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes Pilot Jokes
You're a redneck if:
- You have more fingers than you do teeth
- You cut your grass and find a car
- You consider Denny's a Fancy Restaurant
- Your best Suit contains more than 5 colors
- Your age is higher than your I.Q.
- Your favorite pickup line is "Does this look infected to you?"
- You ask your wife whether the spot on your neck is a boil or a mole and she replies "It's a gummy bear."
- You have a family reunion and everyone in town shows up.
- You say "Watch this" every time before you go to the hospital.
Your wife and ex-wife are sisters.
84 0
0
Redneck jokes Car and driving jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Stupid Jokes Restaurant Jokes
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette all enter the International Вrеаsт Sтrоке Swim across the English Channel.
After about 8 hours, the brunette makes it across, followed shortly by the redhead.
No sign of the blonde.
After 12 hours they decide they'd better go look for her when she pretty much washes up on shore.
They rush over to her and wrap her in warm blankets and give her a hot drink.
After a few minutes, she is breathing easier and says, "I don't like to tattle, but I think those other ladies were using their arms!"
79 0
0
Blonde Jokes Jokes about Women Sports Jokes Stupid Jokes
Patty was quietly minding her own business, eating her soup alone in her booth at a local eatery, when a voice startled her from behind.
It was the guy in the booth behind her.
"Not so loud!" he said.
"What?" she questioned, as she took another spoonful of soup.
"I said not so loud!" was his muffled reply.
Embarrassed at being told she was slurping her soup, she pushed away her bowl and started her grilled cheese sandwich.
"How was your day?" questioned the man from behind once again.
"Pretty good" responded Patty, confused that this stranger would care.
"Did you pass the exam?" came the next question from behind.
"I don't know, I didn't get my grade yet" replied a thoroughly bewildered Patty.
"I'll have to call you back when I'm out of here", came the voice from behind once again, "some nut job is answering every question I ask you!
39 0
0
Office and Work Jokes Food Jokes Men jokes Stupid Jokes Superhero Jokes
Yo Momma so sтuрid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, ''Wait!
Stop! Thieves! You forgot the remote!''
2 0
0
Yo Momma Jokes Technology Jokes Insult Jokes Stupid Jokes
In a shop for kids. Peter selects a toy car, comes to the cash desk and gives the cashier money-cards from Monopoly game. The cashier:
- Are you sтuрid? This isn't real money!
Peter:
- You're sтuрid. The car is not real either.
40 0
0
Kids Jokes Car and driving jokes Money jokes Stupid Jokes
The only qualification for working at an airline is making a confused face at a monitor.
82 0
0
Office and Work Jokes Stupid Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes
Eight hours into his trial Раddy pleads guilty.
"Why didn't you plead guilty at the beginning and save the court's time?"
The judge demanded.
"Well," Раddy responded, "until I heard all the evidence I thought I was innocent."
0 0
0
Judge and Court Jokes Prison Jokes Stupid Jokes
On the Internet you can be anything you want. It's so strange that many people choose to be sтuрid.
41 0
0
Internet Jokes Stupid Jokes
A young ventriloquist is touring Norway and puts on a show in a small fishing town. With his duммy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes.
Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting, 'I've heard enough of your sтuрid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype Norwegian blonde women that way? What does the color of a woman's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's men like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community, and from reaching our full potential as people. Its people like you that make others think that all blondes are dumb. You and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes but women in general, pathetically all in the name of humor!'The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde interrupts yelling, 'You stay out of this..I'm talking to that little shiт on your lap.'
90 0
0
Blonde Jokes Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Stupid Jokes Military Jokes
A redneck calls up the White House and tells the receptionist: "I'd like to become the next President of the United States."
The receptionist: "What are you, an idiот?"
Redneck: "Why, is it required?"
83 1
0
Redneck jokes Political Jokes Stupid Jokes Phone jokes
An airman in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a marine joke?"
The guy next to him replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something.
I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs, and I'm a marine.
The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, weighs 225, and he's a marine.
The fella next to him is 6'5" tall, weighs 250, and he's also a marine.
Now, you still wanna tell that joke?"
The Airman says, "Nah, I don't want to have to explain it three times."
42 0
0
Military Jokes Aviation Jokes Stupid Jokes
There was a preacher who fell in the ocean and he couldn't swim. When a boat came by, the captain yelled:
"Do you need help, sir?"
The preacher calmly said
"No, God will save me."
A little later, another boat came by and a fisherman asked,
"Hey, do you need help?"
The preacher replied again,
"No God will save me."
Eventually the preacher drowned & went to heaven. The preacher asked God,
"Why didn't you save me?"
God replied,
"Fool, I sent you two boats!"
1 0
0
Los barcos y el naufrago pidiendo ayuda πιστη στο θεο Θεϊκή παρέμβαση Old Mrs. Watkins awoke one spring morning to find that the river had flooded the entire first floor of her house. Un curé qui se promène dans la nature est pris dans les sables mouvants. Alors qu'il s'enfonce jusqu'au aux chevilles, un camion de pompiers passe par là. Един човек бил много вярващ. Уповавал се на Бог за всичко. В селото, в което живеел, завалял проливен дъжд. Реката придошла, излязла от коритото си и заляла улиците. Хората започнали да се спасяват кой както може! Само вярващия човек седял пред прага на къщата си и си повтарял: "Бог ще ми... Станало голямо наводнение. Водата започнала да нахлува в сградите. В една къща набожен човек стоял се молел на Господ да го спаси. Водата стигнала до първия етаж. Докато човекът се молел, покрай къщата му минал друг човек с лодка и му викнал: - Качвай се в лодката и да се спасяваме! Набожният... Un curé est en train de se noyer au milieu d'un fleuve. Par chance, il passe une péniche qui lui envoie une corde : "Accrochez vous, mon père!" lui lance le batelier. Le curé répond "je vous remercie mon, fils, mais je fais confiance à Dieu pour me sauver". Le curé est toujours en train de se... Ein Mann wurde ins freie Meer geworfen. Kommt ein Boot vorbei. Kapitän: "Soll ich dich retten?" Mann: "Nein, Gott wird mir schon helfen!" Nach einer Weile kommt ein weiteres Boot. Kapitän: "Soll... Rencontre avec Dieu Un homme veut mourir en s'enfonçant dans les sables mouvants, mais des pompiers viennent le chercher : "Monsieur, nous allons vous tirer de là." "Non, je veux que Dieu me... Uma pequena cidade do interior estava enfrentando uma enchente, cada vez mais o nível do rio estava subindo, então resolveram evacuar a cidade. Levaram toda a população embora, menos o padre que... so theres this christian man and hes on top of his roof, because hes getting floded, the water is up to his ankles, and he prays to god. man: please god, please can you save me. ten minuets later a... A man was drowning and asked God to help him. A boat came by wanting to help the man. The man refused and said that God would save him. The man drowned and went to heaven. He asked God why... A priest is drowning in a river… A boat comes along and asks to help him. He says “leave me alone, god will save me.” The next day another boat came along and asked to help him. Again he said... Er was eens een man die het oerwoud in wilde. Dus ging hij op een dag het oerwoud in. Toen hij daar eindelijk aangekomen was, bleef hij vastzitten in het drijfzand. Hij zei: "Geen paniek, God helpt... Powódź w prowincjonalnym miasteczku. Ewakuacja ludności. Wojsko puka do kaplicy: - Proszę księdza, niech ksiądz ucieka! Ksiądz się utopi! - Nigdzie nie idę, wierzę w Opatrzność Boską. Po trzech... Det var en gång två män som hette Frank och Peter.. En dag så blev det Översvämmning och deras vägar var dränkta.. Så kom Peter med en kanot till Franks hus och sa - Kom ut därifrån du kommer... Een man staat tot z'n knieen in het water, komt er een speetboot aan en stopt even om de man uit het water te halen. Zegt de man in het water: "Nee, dat hoeft niet want god komt mij redden." Poosje... C'est un croyant qui est dans le sable mouvant:il en a jusqu'aux genoux les pompiers viennent il dit "Dieu va me sauver". Il en a jusqu'au torse les pompiers reviennent, il dit "Dieu va me sauver".... Un calugarul cade in mare. Apare imediat o barca cu salvamari: - Va simtiti bine? Aveti nevoie de ajutor?! - Nuu! Dumnezeu ma va salva el pe mine... Mai inghite calugarul niste apa ... Si mai vine... C'est un curé qui est en train de se noyer dans un lac. Les pompiers arrivent et veulent le sauver mais le curé dit "Dieu me sauvera". Donc les pompiers rentre a la caserne mais leur chef  les... Habia un hombre que se cayo al mar y se estaba ahogando aparece un barco y le dice dale subi y el hombre dice no a mi me va a salvar dios aparece otro barco y le dice lo mismo y el hombre dice no a... Egy pap fuldoklik a folyóban. Arra megy egy gátőr és felé nyújt egy hosszú rudat. - Fogja meg, kihúzom! - Nem, köszönöm, az Isten majd segít! - Fogja már meg, kihúzom!- erősködik a gátőr. - Hagyja... En präst håller på att drunkna i havet och en båt kör förbi. De på båten frågar: - Vill du ha hjälp? Prästen svarar: - Nej tack, Gud kommer att rädda mig. Båten kör förbi och efter ett tack kör en... Un cura seva ala selva y caen en arenas mobedizas biene un bombero y le dice señor necesita ayuda no¡ dios me salbara.... luego viene otro vombero i le dice señor neesita ayuda i dice no¡ dios me... A man goes swimming in the ocean but gets sucked out to sea. A boat passes by him and tells him to climb aboard but he says, "I have faith, God will save me." The Coast Guard comes by with a rescue...
Religion jokes God Jokes Heaven And Hell Jokes Stupid Jokes Military Jokes
There were these two blonds and they locked their keys in their car.
The one blonde says to the other, "What do we do? Do we get a coat hanger and pick the lock?"
The other one replied, "No, people will think we're trying to break in."
The other one said, "Well do we get a knife and cut the rubber and pop the lock?"
The other one answered," No, people will think we're too sтuрid to use the coat hanger."
The other one said, "Well we better think of something quick because it's starting to rain and the sunroof is open."
85 0
0
Две блондинки отиват на пазар. Η οροφή Πέρα βρέχει.... Блондинка на бензиностанция. Зарежда колата, отива, плаща, връща се, и... Класическа ситуация - ключът вътре, колата заключена... Eine Blondine stürmt in eine Werkstatt und hechelt: A blonde walks into a gas station and says to the manager, "I locked my keys in my car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?" There are three blonds that went to the store. ,After they get done in the store one of the blondes realizes that she locked her keys in her car. ,The first blond tried using a screwdriver to unlock the door. ,The second blond tried using a hanger. ,The third blond tried using... Μια ξανθιά κλείδωσε τα κλειδιά της στο αυτοκίνητο. Πηγαίνει λοιπόν σε ένα συνεργείο και ζητάει ένα σύρμα για να τραβήξει την ασφάλεια από το λίγο ανοιχτό παράθυρο του αυτοκινήτου της. Έκπληκτος ο μηχανικός που μια ξανθιά μπόρεσε να σκεφθεί μια τέτοια λύση, της λέεί και βέβαια έχω σύρμα, αλλά θα... Två blondiner hade råkat låsa in sina nycklar i bilen. En av blondinerna försökte bryta sig in i bilen medans den andra kollade så att kusten var klar. Till sist gav den första blondinen upp och sa: - Jäklar, jag kan inte komma in i bilen.... Deux blondes sont dans un stationnement en train d'essayer de débarrer la porte de leur Mercedes avec un support car elles ont embarré les clefs a l'intérieur... La première blonde dit : - Maudit,... Twee blondjes staan bij de auto te sukkelen met het slot. Ze zijn namelijk de sleutel kwijt. Plots begint het zachtjes te regenen. Zegt het ene blondje tegen het andere: "Schiet op, het regent... Det var en gang to blondine som var å handlet. Da de kom tilbake til bilen, fant de ut at nøklen var låst inne. De to blondinene sto der i mange timer for å prøve å få opp døren, men til ingen... Sally and Brenda (both blondes) exited and locked the car in a hurry, forgetting to remove the key, which was in the ignition. Realizing the mistake, Sally asked, "Why don't we get a coat hanger... Δυο ξανθιές προσπαθούν να ξεκλειδώσουν την πόρτα του αυτοκινήτου τους με μια κρεμάστρα. Πρώτη ξανθιά: Δεν μπορώ να την ξεκλειδώσω αυτή την πόρτα Δεύτερη ξανθιά: Καλύτερα να βιαστείς. Έχει ξεκινήσει...
Blonde Jokes Car and driving jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Weather jokes
  • Previous
  • Next
Privacy and Policy Contact Us