Office and Work Jokes

Most popular in this category
Office and Work Jokes Blonde Jokes Police Officer Jokes
Office and Work Jokes Money jokes Business jokes
Once you start playing with software you quickly become aware that each
Software package has a revision code attached to it. It is obvious that
This revision code gives the sequence of changes to the product, but in
Reality there's substantially more information available through the rev
Code than that. This is a guide for interpreting the meaning of the
Revision codes and what they actually signify.
1.0: Also known as "one point uh-oh", or "barely out of beta". We had
To release because the lab guys had reached a point of exhaustion and
The marketing guys were in a cold sweat of terror. We're praying that
You'll find it more functional than, say, a computer virus and that its
Operation has some resemblance to that specified in the marketing copy.
1.1: We fixed all the killer bugs...
1.2: Uh, we introduced a few new bugs fixing the killer bugs and so we
Had to fix them, too.
2.0: We did the product we really wanted to do to begin with. Mind you,
It's really not what the customer needs yet, but we're working on it.
2.1: Well, not surprisingly, we broke some things in making major
Changes so we had to fix them. But we did a really good job of testing
This time, so we don't think we introduced any new bugs while we were
Fixing these bugs.
2.2: Uh, sorry, one slipped through. One lousy typo error and you won't
Believe how much trouble it caused!
2.3: Some jеrк found a deep-seated bug that's been there since 1.0 and
Wouldn't stop nagging until we fixed it!!
3.0: Hey, we finally think we've got it right! Most of the customers
Are really happy with this.
3.1: Of course, we did break a few little things.
4.0: More features. It's doubled in size now, by the way, and you'll
Need to get more memory and a faster processor ...
4.1: Just one or two bugs this time ... Honest!
5.0: We really need to go on to a new product, but we have an installed
Base out there to protect. We're cutting the staffing after this.
6.0: We had to fix a few things we broke in 5.0. Not very many, but
It's been so long since we looked at this thing we might as well call it
A major upgrade. Oh, yeah, we added a few flashy cosmetic features so we
Could justify the major upgrade number.
6.1: Since I'm leaving the company and I'm the last guy left in the lab
Who works on the product, I wanted to make sure that all the changes
I've made are incorporated before I go. I added some cute demos, too,
Since I was getting pretty bored back here in my dark little corner (I
Kept complaining about the lighting but they wouldn't do anything).
They're talking about obsolescence planning but they'll try to keep
Selling it for as long as there's a buck or two to be made. I'm leaving
The bits in as good a shape as I can in case somebody has to tweak them,
But it'll be sheer luck if no one loses them.
Office and Work Jokes Computer Jokes Military Jokes
Мажот решил да и се извини на жената Δεύτερη ερωτική γνώμη Δεύτερη γνώμη Семеен скандал на закуска. Мъжът ядосан става от масата: C'est un docteur et sa femme qui ont une violente dispute le matin. Le médecin finit par hurler à sa femme: - Tu es nulle au lit ... et il s'en va au boulot. Dans la matinée, pris par les remords, il décide d'appeler sa femme au téléphone pour s'excuser et tenter de faire la paix. Le téléphone... Pelea de la pareja durante el desayuno! Después de una discusión, el marido sale para su trabajo y le grita a la esposa: - Y para que sepas: Ni siquiera en la cama sos buena !!!!!!! Pasado algun... Depois de uma briga horrível, o marido sai para o trabalho gritando: — E tem mais: nem boa de cama você é! Depois de algum tempo, ele se arrepende e liga pra casa, pra se desculpar. O telefone toca... Een arts en zijn vrouw bedrijven de liefde en na afloop zegt hij: “je kan er niets van!” De vrouw stapt kwaad uit bed. Later die dag op zijn praktijk krijgt de arts toch spijt van wat hij heeft... Un matin, juste avant de partir à son cabinet, un médecin s'engueule copieusement avec son épouse. Avant de claquer la porte, il lui lance : - Ah, il faut que je te dise encore une chose... Tu es... Lekarz pokłócił się strasznie przy śniadaniu z żoną: - Ty też nie jesteś taka dobra w łóżku! - wykrzyczał i wybiegł do pracy. Później tego ranka stwierdza, że powinien to naprawić i dzwoni do domu:... Мажот, лекар се кара со својата жена, домаќинка за време на појадокот, бесен бега од масата и вели: - И да знаеш, воопшто не си добра во кревет! На работа сваќа дека претерал и дека треба да се... Un tip si sotia lui se cearta De zor la micul dejun: - Si daca vrei sa Stii, nici nu esti foarte bun la pat! ii spune ea si Pleaca la lucru trantind usa. Pe la amiaza Incepe sa-i para rau si suna...
Office and Work Jokes Cheating Jokes
Office and Work Jokes Old People Jokes Priest Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes
Office and Work Jokes Men jokes Business jokes
Signs you've had too much of the '90s Part I
1. You try to enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played patience with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail your work colleague at the desk next to you to ask, "Do you fancy going down the pub?" and they reply, "Yeah, give me five minutes".
5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South America, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
6. You buy a computer and a week later it is out of date.
7. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
8. You consider regular mail painfully slow or call it "snail mail".
9. Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes.
10. You hear most of your jokes via email instead of in person.
11. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in a business manner.
12. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally insert a 0 to get an outside line.
13. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three different companies.
14. Your company welcome sign is attached with Velcro.
15. Your CV is on a diskette in your pocket.
16. You really get excited about a 1.7% pay rise.
17. You learn about your redundancy on the 6 o'clock news.
18. Your biggest loss from a system crash is that you lose all your best jokes.
19. Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.
20. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get long-service awards.
Office and Work Jokes News and Politics Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Computer Jokes USA Jokes Friendship Jokes Boss Jokes
Jokes about Women Office and Work Jokes Police Officer Jokes Stupid Jokes