Stupid Jokes

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A redhead, a blonde and a brunette were stuck on an island and had to get back home from the island.
The redhead swims half way and drowns.
The brunette swims half way and drowns too.
The blonde swims halfway gets tired and swims back.

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Redhead Jokes Sports Jokes Blonde Jokes Redneck jokes Stupid Jokes

At the gym:
Me: "What does this machine do?"
"Sir, that's a bench."
Me: "Perfect."

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Fitness jokes Stupid Jokes

A blonde enters a library.
She goes to the counter and says "I'll like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola."
The librarian says "Ma'am this is library."
So the blonde leans in and whispers "I'd like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola."

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Blonde Jokes Food Jokes Business jokes Stupid Jokes

Q: Did you hear that the White House isn't displaying it's Nativity scene this year?
A: They couldn't find the three wise men!

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Republican jokes Insult Jokes Men jokes Political Jokes Stupid Jokes

Doctor: "You look much worse than you did last week! I said you should smoke a maximum of five cigarettes a day!"
Patient: "And that's what I did. And it wasn't easy because up until now I didn't smoke at all!"

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes

Three guys are at a restaurant, all with their girlfriends.
The first guy, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the honey?...Honey."
Now, the second guy, copying the first, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the sugar?...Sugar."
So now, the third guy is under pressure.
He has to come up with something good.
After, a minute of thinking he says to his girlfriend, "Pass me the pork...pig."

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Men jokes Stupid Jokes Restaurant Jokes

A blonde pushes her BMW into the gas station and tells the mechanic that it died.
After working on it for a few minutes, he has it idling smoothly.
"What's the story?" she asked.
"Just сrар in the carburator," the mechanic replied.
"How often do I have to do that?" asked the blonde.

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Blonde Jokes Office and Work Jokes Car and driving jokes Stupid Jokes BMW jokes

Yo mama so sтuрid that when she turned on airplane mode...
She thought she could fly.

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Yo Momma Jokes Technology Jokes Aviation Jokes Stupid Jokes

An aircraft is flying when all over sudden a bird crashes through the cockpit and kills both the pilot and co pilot.
Having heard the crash a blonde flight attendant rushes in to find out what happened.
Once inside the cockpit the plane jerks and the cabin door slams shut and can't be opened.
So she pulls the captain out of his seat and sits down, taking the radio into her hands and says,
"May Day! May Day! Help Me! Help Me! The pilots are dead and I don't know how to fly. Help Me! Please Help Me!"
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
"This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position!"
"I'm 5'4 and in the front seat of the plane."
"O.K." says the voice on the radio. "Repeat after me: Our father who art in heaven..."

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Aviation Jokes Blonde Jokes Animal Jokes Stupid Jokes Travel and Tourist Jokes Military Jokes Pilot Jokes

Yo mama's so dumb that when she saw the "Under 17 not admitted" sign at a movie theatre, she went home and got 16 friends.

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Yo Momma Jokes Old People Jokes Friendship Jokes Stupid Jokes

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?
For hispanic attacks.

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Mexican jokes Donald Trump Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes Chemistry Jokes Stupid Jokes

Yo mama is so sтuрid that she thought starbucks are money in space.

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Yo Momma Jokes Money jokes Stupid Jokes

Yo mama is so sтuрid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.

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Yo Momma Jokes Food Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes

Two blondes were talking together:
First: "How about your engaged Jim? Is he keeping well?"
Second: "He isn't just now my engaged."
First: Hi good news. His nose was too big and his head was bald with an ugly face!"
Second: "He is now my husband!"

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Marriage and Family Jokes Blonde Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Ugly Jokes

Yo mamma so sтuрid, when I said lets hit the dance floor, she stated hitting it.

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Yo Momma Jokes Insult Jokes Stupid Jokes

When asked for his name by the coffee shop clerk, my brother-in-law answered, "Marc, with a C."
Minutes later, he was handed his coffee with his name written on the side: Cark.

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Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes Coffee Jokes

Yo mama so sтuрid that when you told her the mouse on her computer was broken she took it to the vet.

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Yo Momma Jokes Technology Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Computer Jokes Stupid Jokes

The woman was in bed with her lover and had just told him how sтuрid her Irish husband was when the door was thrown open and there stood her husband.
He glared at her lover and bellowed, "What are you doing?"
"There," said the wife, "didn’t I tell you he was sтuрid?"

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Irish jokes Jokes about Women Marriage and Family Jokes Sex Jokes Stupid Jokes

You know you're a redneck if your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back.

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Redneck jokes Stupid Jokes

My blonde girlfriend went to the doctors this morning and was told she had two weeks to live.
She chose last week and this week.

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Blonde Jokes Sick and Death Jokes Stupid Jokes