Stupid Jokes

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Teacher: "Who knows 5+5=?"
Little Johnny: "11"
Teacher: "Take out your hand from trousers pocket and count with your fingers."

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School Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Dirty jokes Math Jokes Stupid Jokes

Yo momma so sтuрid she thought that doctor pepper could heal her.

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Yo Momma Jokes Food Jokes Medical and Doctor Jokes Stupid Jokes

Two dyslectic fellas sat in the kitchen...
Fella 1: "Ere, can you smell gas?"
Fella 2: "Who me? No... I can't even smell my own name!"

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Medical and Doctor Jokes Friendship Jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes

Jill: "How did you find the weather on your vacation?"
Bill: "I just went outside and there it was!"

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Stupid Jokes Weather jokes

Client: "Please remove the unnecessary circle at the end of the sentence."
Me: "You mean... the period?"
Client: "I don't care what you designers call it; it is unsightly. Delete it."

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Car and driving jokes Office and Work Jokes Customer service jokes Communication Jokes Stupid Jokes

When my customer ordered iced tea, I asked, "Sweetened or unsweetened?"
Her answer: "What's the difference?"

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Customer service jokes Stupid Jokes

Your mom's so dumb, she threw the dog and told the stick to fetch!

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Yo Momma Jokes Animal Jokes Stupid Jokes Dog jokes

I asked the boss if I could get a raise, and he said:
"Because of the fluctuational predisposition of your position's productive capacity as juxtaposed to the industry standards, it would be monetarily injudicious to advocate an increment."
I said, "I don't get it."
He said, "That's right."

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Management Jokes Money jokes Stupid Jokes Boss Jokes

A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work.
The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said,
"Your first job will be to sweep out the store."
"But I'm a college graduate," the young man replied indignantly.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," said the manager. "Here, give me the broom – I'll show you how."

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Office and Work Jokes Men jokes College jokes Management Jokes Graduation Jokes Stupid Jokes Boss Jokes

A blonde's house is on fire.
She runs outside and yells, "Help me! My house is on fire! What do I do?!"
Someone else yells, "Call 911!"
The blonde yells back, "What's the number?"

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Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes Phone jokes

Two adventurers John and Jack were hunting for gold in the desert.
After roaming all day long under the hot sun, they set up their tent and fell asleep.
Some hours later, John woke up his friend.
"Jack, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Jack looked up and replied, "I can see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" asked John.
Jack thought for a minute and said.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
After a moment of silence, John spoke.
"It tells two things to me. First is that... you are an idiот."
Jack looked at John, surprised. "Why do you say so?" he said.
"Because it has still not occurred to you that someone has stolen our tent." replied John.

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Friendship Jokes Hunting Jokes Science jokes Stupid Jokes

Yo Mama's so dumb she waited all day at a stop sign.

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Yo Momma Jokes Insult Jokes Stupid Jokes

A brunette and a blonde are walking in the park.
The brunette asks: "Hey can you see that forest over there?"
The blonde looks that way and answers: "I can't, the trees are covering the view."

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Blonde Jokes Stupid Jokes

The cowboy was trying to buy a health insurance policy.
The insurance agent was going down the list of standard questions.
"Ever have an accident?"
"Nope, nary a one."
"None? You've never had any accidents."
"Nope. Ain't had one. Never."
"Well, you said in this form you were bitten by a snake once. Wouldn't you consider that an accident?"
"Heck, no. That dang varmint bit me on purpose."

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Cowboys and Indians Jokes Animal Jokes Sick and Death Jokes Stupid Jokes Insurance Comedy

Yo mama so dumb, she thought seaweed was something that fish smoked.

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Yo Momma Jokes Animal Jokes Drug Jokes Stupid Jokes

Yo mama is so sтuрid, she was looking for bluetooth at the orthodontist.

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Yo Momma Jokes Technology Jokes Insult Jokes Stupid Jokes

Recently, I woke up to find that two of my car's tires had been stolen. When the police officer arrived, he asked, "When were you last driving the car?"
"Last night at 11:00," I said.
"And the tires were on it then?"

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Police Officer Jokes Car and driving jokes Stupid Jokes

I use the internet to tell me what the weather's like.
How do you do that?
I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet, I know it's raining!

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IT jokes Technology Jokes Internet Jokes Stupid Jokes Weather jokes

Q: what is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: Trying to hold onto a thought.

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Beauty Jokes Stupid Jokes

Q: Why did the blonde buy a brown соw?
A: To get chocolate milk.

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Blonde Jokes Animal Jokes Chocolate Jokes Stupid Jokes