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Dark Humor Jokes

Newest jokes in this category

There was once a man named Odd. People made fun of him because of his name so he decided to keep his gravestone blank when he died.Now when people pass by the burial site, they point and say, "That's odd."

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Dark Humor Jokes

A fisherman and his wife had twin sons named Towards and Away.
Once the boys were grown, the fisherman took them out to sea to learn the family fishing trade.
A week later, the mother saw her husband dock the boat all alone.
"Oh no! What has happened to my darling boys?" she cried.
"We were just one day out to sea, when Towards hooked a great fish. He fought long and hard, but he was pulled over the side and swallowed whole by the fish."
"Oh dear, what a huge, horrible fish that must of been!"
"Yes, it was, but you should have seen the one that got Away."

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Dark Humor Jokes

- I'm not convinced. I'm going to go give her a good shaking?
- I'm sure we'll all be laughing about this in no time!
- It's funny - we all thought you'd be the first to go, Grandpa.
- You know, your husband never paid back that $50 he owed

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Dark Humor Jokes

What's the last thing a redneck says before he dies?
Hey! Watch this...

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Blue Collar Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Redneck jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: It doesn't matter - he's not going to come anyway.

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Animal Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes Dog jokes

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?
'Cause he was dead!

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Animal Jokes Dark Humor Jokes

What do women and Slinkies have in common?
Not really too much, but you can't help but сrаск a smile when one tumbles down the stairs.

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Dark Humor Jokes Jokes about Women One-Liner Jokes Yo Momma Jokes Morbid jokes

Roses are red
violets are blue
I have 5 fingers
the middle one for you.

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Funny Poems Pick-Up Lines Jokes Insult Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Relationship Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

Let me tell you why I hate Valentine's Day -- 'cause a few years ago, on Valentine's night, I thought I would have a nice, romantic evening in with a lady. But little did I know, that that same night, her ex-boyfriend thought he would try to win her heart back. And, being the sweet, romantic guy that he is, he thought the best way to do this would be to get all coked up and then jump through a window and try to мurdеr me.

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Valentine's Day Jokes Dark Humor Jokes

A man walks into a bar.
He is an alcoholic and is ruining his family.

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Drinking and Drunk Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Men jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles?
Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Dark Humor Jokes Baby Jokes

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub?
17.

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Dark Humor Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

How do you stop a black person from drowning?
Take your foot off the back of his head.

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Dark Humor Jokes Black People Jokes

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff?
They were my friends.

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Dark Humor Jokes Friendship Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

Whats better than winning an award?
Not having your family shot to death.

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Dark Humor Jokes Marriage and Family Jokes

Why did a boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Dark Humor Jokes Anti-Humor Jokes

A man walks into a bar. Except it was a metal bar, like a pole. So he got hurt.

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Dark Humor Jokes Men jokes

How long does it take for a black women to take a сrар?
9 months

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Ethnic and Racial Jokes Jokes about Women Dark Humor Jokes Black People Jokes

While I was having a medical, I asked the doctor if I'd live to be 100.
"Not with Mercury in Uranus" he replied.
"I don't believe in Astrology", I noted.
"Neither do I, he said - my thermometer just broke off in your аrsе".

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Dark Humor Jokes

Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

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Dark Humor Jokes