Chuck Norris

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Once, an entire country disagreed with Chuck Norris.
It's now known as the moon

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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest.
Chuck Norris won by 5.

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Chuck Norris kills time in his spare time.

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Chuck Norris has an Xbox Live account. On Playstation

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When cops pull Chuck Norris over, THEY try to talk THEIR way out of it.

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A black hole is created when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks a sun.

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The Mayans predict that Chuck Norris going to roundhouse kick this earth in the year 2012.

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Ghosts actually have their own kind of tv.
The show that scares them the most is called "Chuck Norris Caught On Tape".

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Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.

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Chuck Norris can toast bread in a freezer.

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Chuck Norris can actually describe the taste of purified water.

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The Question Mark was invented after scientists attempted to measure the speed of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.

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Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.

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Chuck Norris doesn't check the time - he decides it.

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Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.

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Why aren't the aliens making contact?
They are afraid of Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris puts all of his baskets in one egg.

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Nice guys finish last because bad guys run faster from Chuck Norris.

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