Chuck Norris

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When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.

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After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.

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Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.

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If you say Chuck Norris' name in Mongolia, the people there will roundhouse kick you in his honor.
Their kick will be followed by the REAL roundhouse delivered by none other than Norris himself.

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Chuck Norris doesn’t ride a horse, he uses his crotch to carry it.

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Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.

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Chuck Norris only weakness, is weakness, of course!

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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

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When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.

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If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.

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Chuck Norris has 12 moons.
One of those moons is the Earth.

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Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.

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Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.

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Chuck Norris never felt fear, and he never will.

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A rattle snake bit Chuck Norris in the leg and the snake died instantly!

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Chuck Norris can never fill out an online form, because Chuck Norris will never submit.

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A watched рот boils instantly for Chuck Norris.

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When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.

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