Poems jokes, Funny Poems

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular

If you have a grief nobody feels.
If you have a pain nobody feels.
If your heart is broken nobody feels, but if you fаrт all will understand.

86

0

Grass is green,
trees are greener.
When I think of you,
I play with my wiener.

72

0

I dig,
You dig,
We dig,
He digs,
She digs,
They dig.
It's not a beautiful poem, but it's very deep...

72

0

Roses are red,
violets are blue.
Pornhub is Down,
your mums Facebook will do.

62

0

Holy mother, full of grace Bless my boyfriend's gorgeous face
Bless his hair that tends to curl
Keep him safe from all the girls
Bless his arms that are so strong
Keep his hands where they belong
Bless his diск, the one i sucked
Bless the bed, in which we fucked
And if my Mom happened to walk in
Bless the shiт I'd be in.

60

0

Roses are red
violets are blue.
My diск has glue
I offer it to you.

55

1

Roses are blue
My thumb's got a sliver
I drank far too much and I'm killing my liver.

54

0

I am a dog
And you are a flower.
I lift my leg up
And give you a shower.

49

4

There was a crooked woman,
who ran a crooked mile.
She found a crooked Wеinеr,
who always made her smile.
She belongs in prison,
for she is just a crook.
And if you don't believe me,
you can read it in her book.

43

0

Mary held her little daughter,
Twenty minutes under water.
Not to care for any troubles,
Just to look at those funny bubbles.

43

0

My nookie days are over
My pilot light is out
What used to be my sеx appeal
Is now my water spout.
Time was when, on its own accord
From my trousers it would spring
But now I've got a full-time job
To find the blasted thing.
It used to be embarrassing
The way it would behave
For every single morning
It would stand and watch me shave.
Now as old age approaches
It sure gives me the blues
To see it hang its little head
And watch me tie my shoes.

41

0

It can buy a House.
But not a Home
It can buy a Bed
But not Sleep
It can buy a Clock
But not Time
It can buy you a Book
But not Knowledge
It can buy you a Position
But not Respect
It can buy you Medicine
But not Health
It can buy you Blood
But not Life
So you see, Money isn't everything.
And it often causes pain and suffering.
I tell you all this because I am your Friend, and as your Friend I want totake away your pain and suffering...
So send me all your money and I will suffer for you.
A more true Friend you will never find.

39

0

Fly like a butterfly sting like a bee I slept with yo mama now it burns when I рее.

36

0

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray this cushy life to keep.
I pray for toys that look like mice,
And sofa cushions, soft and nice.
I pray for gourmet kitty snacks,
And someone nice to scratch my back,
For windowsills all warm and bright,
For shadows to explore at night.
I pray I'll always stay real cool
And keep the secret feline rule
To never tell a human that
The world is really ruled by cats!

35

0

Kissing is a habit
Fucking is a game
Guys get all the pleasure
Girls get all the pain
The guy says I love you
You believe its true
But when your tummy starts to swell,
He says 'to hеll with you'
10 minutes of pleasure
9 months in pain
3 days in hospital
A baby without a name
The baby is a bastard
The mother is a whore
This never wouldn't have happened
If the rubber wouldn't have torn

35

0

Sеx is when a guys communication,
enters a girls information,
to increase the population,
for a younger generation,
do you get the information...
or do you need a demonstration.

34

0

I like your style
I like your class
but most of all i like your аss.

33

0

AT WORK, Michael: Why you white guys always so happy?
Casey: Because I make love to my wife every morning before work.
Michael: Say whaaat? You get her to make love EVERY morning? How do you do that?
Casey: It's easy, I just say a poem, women love poems and will fall for them all the time.
Michael: Ok, what kind of poem can you say to make her make love every morning?
Casey: I say, "blonde hair, blonde hair, eyes of blue, I love to wake up and make love to you.
Michael: HAHAAA she falls for that?
Casey: yes you should try it.
NEXT DAY TYRONE COMES IN WITH BLACK EYE FАТ LIP AND A TOOTH MISSING.
Casey: What happened to you?
Michael: Well, I said a poem to my wife and she didn't like it.
Casey: She didn't like it? What did you say?
Michael: Nаррy head, nаррy head, eyes like a frog, if I could roll your fат аss over I would do you like a dog.

33

0