(This is a true account of my advice to my pre-teen a few years back. We all know, for the most part that 5th grade boys haven’t started to develop, yet they are still proud of their alleged superiority and having “something” that girls don’t have, and ages ten and eleven are among the ugliest ages for taunting and bullying during “recess” and on the school buses.)
So my ten year old confides in me that a group of boys taunt her every day that she is a “Pirate’s Dream,” with a “sunken chest.” So I asked her: “Who is the ‘ringleader?'”
She told me, and I said, “Tomorrow, look him straight in the eye, and respond, ‘You’re a fine one to talk, centimeter peter.’ ”
Two days later, she said, “I did you one better, daddy, I called him ‘millimeter peter’ and all his friends laughed at him as he slunk away in shame.”
She never had any further trouble and by age 16, she had a more than respectable rack.
During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question: ‘
Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to… the bathroom?’
Michael said: ‘Just a minute I have to go рее.’
The teacher responded by saying: ‘That would be rude and impolite‚. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?’
Sherman said: ‘I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.
‘ ‘That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.
And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?’
Johnny said: ‘I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce to you after dinner.’
The teacher was speechless….