Christmas Jokes

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Christmas time.
Vаliuм and wine.
Children indulging in serious сriме.
With dad on the wееd and mum high on сrаск.
Christmas is magic when your family is black!

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Start preparing for Christmas early...
By falling out with friends and family today...

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1. Yo mama so sтuрid she got locked in a mattress store and slept on the floor.
2. Yo mama so fат I took a picture if her last Christmas (2013) and its still printing.
3. Yo mama so fат when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.

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A Christmas Joke (... Maybe a LITTLE early)
The guy was in the store buying a fake Christmas tree. The shop attendant asked him, "Are you going to put that tree up yourself?"
The guy replied, "Don't be disgusting! I'm going to put it in the living room!"

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What's Hillary Clinton's favorite Christmas carol?
Depends, what is yours?

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For Christmas my mum bought me a t-shirt saying, "I'm a nudist."
I haven't worn it yet.

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My great grandmother got me a ps4 for christmas
My so-so grandmother got me socks

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The doctor has given me two months to live.
I've chosen August and December, because I like summer but don't want to miss Christmas.

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What you mean behave?! He is doing a handstand!!

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Home Stallone

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"Dear Santa, this year, please send clothes for all those poor ladies in Daddy's computer"

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Found this ID card. Anyone who knows this person

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You don't have to get me anything for Christmas! It's a trap!

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Just before the flight, the disgruntled crew prepared their own silent protest

Just before the flight, the disgruntled crew prepared their own silent protest

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You're suppose to say НО-НО-НО, not NO-NO-NO

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But this guy shot my aunty!

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Santa and chimney in hospital

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Yo mama is so sтuрid, I told her Christmas was right around the corner - so she went looking for it.

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