Chuck Norris

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When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!

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The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.

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Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.

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Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.

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Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck.
There can only be 1 living legend.

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Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.

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Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.

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The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a сriме against humanity.

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Aliens do exist.
They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.

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When Chuck Norris gets bitten by a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris.

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When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.

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Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.

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The real reason that Oprah is ending her show on television is that Chuck phoned and said "That's enough!"

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Chuck Norris bunked school one day.
Till today that day is known as Sunday.

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Chuck Norris made Dirтy Harry's day.

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Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.

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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to кill you... Forty seven times.

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Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.

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