Chuck Norris

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Chuck Norris was supposed to play the lead role in Mission: Impossible.
He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the tittle wouldn't make any sense.

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Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.

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In Radiant Spirits, Solari's body temprature is 120 degrees.
Chuck Norris's body temprature is about 151 degrees.

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Chuck Norris never dies.
And of course, he will also never fade away.

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Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.

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Chuck Norris is so fast that when he runs, he can see his back.

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Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.

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Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.

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Even Google can't find Chuck Norris.

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Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold.
Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.

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Chuck Norris once had a bet with the Hulk, the loser had to paint himself green.

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When Chuck Norris plays hide and seek, even google can't find him.

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Crest fights cavities, Chuck Norris kills them.

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The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.

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Chuck Norris is the meaning of life.
Too bad he's also the meaning of death.

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Chuck Norris never bathes.
Dirt is too afraid to cling to him.

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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

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Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture.
And Won.

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