Chuck Norris

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Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vомiт with fear.

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Chuck Norris's motorcycle has 4WD.

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When Chuck Norris wants salad, he eats a vegetarian.

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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.

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Many years ago Chuck Norris and a brown bear had a fight.
The loser had to go live in the north pole.

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Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

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The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.

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The Matrix once had to take the red pill to escape from Chuck Norris.
It failed.
Nothing can escape from Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris can pull a hat out of a rabbit.

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Chuck Norris is another name for Terror.

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When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.

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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.

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Chuck Norris once broke the land speed record on a bicycle that was missing its chain and the back tire.

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Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

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Chuck Norris does the Sunday New York Times Crossword Puzzle in ink.

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A man taunted Chuck Norris by holding a bag of Lays potato сhiрs in front of him and saying "Betcha can't just one!" Chuck Norris subsequently ate the сhiрs, the bag, and the man whole.

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Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.

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Chuck Norris made this sentence finish.

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