Chuck Norris

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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.

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Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.

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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.

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Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.

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Nations fight other nations but wouldn't have ваlls enough to go toe-to-toe with Chuck Norris.
Remember Atlantis?

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Chuck Norris can do the splits in mid air,rotate his hips 360" so fast it lifts him off the ground thus making the Chuck Copter!

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Chuck Norris could catch that dамn acorn in those ICE AGE movies!

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Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.

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Chuck Norris once threw a pebble.
We now call it... Hayley's Comet.

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Atlas doesn't drop the earth because he knows Chuck Norris lives in it.

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Chuck Norris cleans up сriме... with a mop and bucket... full of people's blood.

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Chuck Norris dosen't need to stand on top of the empire state building to кill someone with a penny.

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Alien from "A. V. P" is just Chuck Norris' Gecko.

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Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.

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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.

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For every victim of a Chuck Norris round house kick, there is a star.
As you can see, there are a lot.

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You know "The Matrix" that was Chuck Norris' very first dream.

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If there's something strange...
In your neighborhood... Who ya gonna call?...
Chuck norris!

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