Chuck Norris

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Chuck Norris does not wear a соndом. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

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Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.

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When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.

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Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.

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Jedis are now taught to use the "Chuck".

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Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.

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Chuck Norris uses a gun to be humane.

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Chuck Norris once had to go to court... The judge got life in prison.

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The Holy Grail is in Chuck Norris's living room.

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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his аss kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.

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Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.

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Chuck Norris was the reason E. T. went home.

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Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.

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Chuck Norris' beard has it's own Social Security number.

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They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.

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Chuck Norris texts with punctuation.

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Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.

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Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.

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