Drug Jokes

Add a joke Newest jokes Most popular

Yo mama so dumb, she thought seaweed was something that fish smoked.

0

0

I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.

0

0

Sleep is my drug….my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police.

0

0

Marijuana is the gateway drug to taking 45 minutes to pick out which color Gatorade you want to buy.

0

0

If there was someone selling drugs in this place, wееd know.

0

0

If my puns are cheesy, then they would go well with crackers.

0

0

Man: I know how to please a woman.
Woman: Then please leave me alone.
Man: I want to give myself to you.
Woman: Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.
Man: Your hair color is fabulous.
Woman: Thank you. It’s on aisle three at the corner drug store.
Man: You look like a dream.
Woman: Go back to sleep.
Man: I can tell that you want me.
Woman: Yes, I want you to leave.
Man: Hey, baby, what’s your sign?
Woman: Do not enter. -OR- Stop.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.
Man: What’s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?
Woman: I hate you.
Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.

0

0

I had a friend named Mari. Sadly she did drugs. So one day I go up to her and say “Mari-juana do this???” She later asked me to leave forever… I don’t gnome why but… it CRACKed me up abit!!!

0

0

What if little johnny was doing drugs?
johnny johnny? yes papa? eating sugar? no papa…

0

0

What do kids and drugs have in common ,
I sell both of the

0

0

your daddy must be a drug dealer because your dope

0

0

Gf- You are a drug.
Bf- Why cause you are addicted to me?
Gf- No, because you are number one most wanted in Montana.

0

0

Q: Why is the roach clip called a roach clip?
A: Because рот holder was taken

0

0

Q: What do you call a stoners wife?
A: Mississippi

0

0

Q: What do you call a bunch of mexican stoners?
A: Baked Beans.

0

0

Q: Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?
A: He was too far out, man!

0

0

Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly?

0

0

Evils of Marijuana
A certain college professor was known for getting off topic during lectures
His favorite off-topic subject was "the evils of marijuana".
One day into his lecture he started talking about wееd,
"Used regularly," he explained,"рот can cause psychic disorientation, sterility, cancer and castration!"
Now wait a minute, professor," interrupted a student. "Castration? Now that's absurd!"
"Yes young man, it's sadly true," replied the professor smugly. "Just suppose your girlfriend gets the munchies!"

0

0