Rabbit sits on a bank of the sea and smokes wееd, little fish sees him and asks him: rabbit, what are you doing?, -I am smoking wееd.
- But why?
- Because it makes me feel great!
- Nice, can i smoke with you please?
- Sure, why not!
- But how do I smoke?
- Just inhale few puffs, keep it in your gills for a while and you will feel awesome.
Fish really inhales few puffs, says bye to the rabbit and swims away. She got really high and thought that everything is awesome in the sea. Suddenly, big blue whale sees her. He says: Hi little fish, where did you get so high?
- With a rabbit.
- Cool, he is my old friend! Where is he?
- He is up there on the bank of the sea.
- Bingo!
And whale showes out from the sea in a front of he rabitt and says: Hi rabbit!
And poor rabbit jumps in the air drops out the joint and starts to scream obviously terrified:
"Exhale fish, exhale."
Appliance Store
A stoner walks into an appliance store and asks the owner, "How much for that TV set in the window?"
The owner looks at the TV set, then looks at the stoner, and says, "I don't sell stuff to potheads."
So the stoner tells the owner that he'll quit smoking рот and will come back the next week to buy the TV.
A week later, the stoner comes back and says, "I quit smoking рот. Now, how much for that TV set in the window?"
And the store owner says, "I told you I don't sell to potheads!"
So the stoner leaves again. He comes back a week later and says, "How much for that TV?"
The owner says, "I'm not going to tell you again, I don't sell to potheads!"
The giggling stoner looks back at the owner and says, "How can you tell I'm a pothead?"
The owner looks back and says, "Because that's a microwave."
Stoner Songs
Weed is good, wееd is fine,
If you share your wееd, ill share mine..
I smoke wееd every day and night
I've smoked so much that i cant see light
I can not see, I can not smell ...shit
I'm in tha beggining of a fuскеd up hеll!
If u think hеll is worse then life
Then if I was you I would pick up tha knife
Stab thyself prepare to cry
But tha key objective is:not to die!
I failed that objective
So im going to die
This is tha end of my rhyme
So i gotta say bye!!
(to Little Ms Muffet)
little druggy sat in her buggy
smoking a joint of weed
along came a spider
who sat down beside her
and sold her a kilo of speed
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke a little leaf,
Jack got high and dropped his fly and Jill said "Where's The Beef?"
Smoking Wееd Is Fun To Do
I Bet One Day You'Ll Do It Too
A Воng A Blunt Maybe Even A Joint
They All Get You High, Get My Point
So With One Single Рuff, As You Take It All In
This Is Where The Fun Begins
I May Be As High,As High As The Sun
But Who Gives A Fuск Its Not Hurtting No One
Some Say Its Bad, Like All Other Drugs
But You'Ll Say Fuск It Once You Look At These Buds
With These Few Last Words I Tell You My Friend
Light That Blunt Up And Let The Fun Begin
Stoners live and stoners die,
But in the end we all get high,
So, if at first you don't suceed,
Fuck this world and smoke some wееd.
Party hardy rock and roll,
Drink a fifth smoke a воwеl,
Pots a plant it grows in the ground
If god didnt want it it wouldn't be around
So all you аsshоlеs who dont get high just shut the fuск up and give it a try
Roll Roll, Roll, a joint pass it down the line
Take a токе hold your smoke вlоw your fuскin mind
I was here, but now I'm not,
I'm round da corner smokin' рот!
I've wrote this message to prove a point,
Life is shiт without a joint!
Baby girl you had it once , you had it twice.
You gonna ask your mother earth another slice.