Birthday Jokes

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What does a man who has everything get his wife for her birthday?
A birthday card.

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Stephen Hawking asked Albert Einstein "What do you want for your birthday?". He responded,
"You.".

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What did the milennial say at his birthday?
Yo, these candles are LIT!

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Birthday's are like speed [OC]
It's not how much you have that kills you, it's the sudden lack of having it.

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My doctor sang this to me at my birthday
"Happy birthday to you. You live in a zoo. You have terminal cancer. Your family'll miss you"

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I got my drug dealer arrested the other day
Maybe next time you'll wish me happy birthday, mom

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What did the kid with Down syndrome get on his birthday?
An extra chromosome.

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Why did the student go to the sтriр club on his 18th birthday?
He wanted to study a broad

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On my birthday, my wife asked me to take her some where she never visited...
On my birthday, my wife asked me to take her some where she never visited. So I took her to the kitchen :P

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A local candle shop burned down...
It didnt help that everyone stood outside and sang happy birthday

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He says to his wife:
"Sleeping with you is like Christmas, Birthday and the 4th of July in a single moment."
To which she replies:
"Well, each of those dates is just once per year too."

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My parents surprised me with a car for my eigtheenth birthday.
Luckily I dodged it.

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