Fat Jokes, Fat people jokes

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“Being obese can cut your risk of dementia”
Let’s rephrase that to
“Fат fuскеrs are less likely to forget where the biscuits are kept”

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The following conversation took place between a husband and wife.
Wife: Would you still love me if I became fат and lost my looks.
Husband: What do you mean “if”?

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Guy: hey Rick Ross, you're so fат.
Rick Ross: yeah. it runs in the family
Guy: nothing runs in your family, you fат f*ck!

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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fат people.

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I was talking to a fат lass with huge тiтs last night.
“My eyes are up here…” I said, as she looked down at the kebab in my hand.

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Boy-Is your body from mcdonalds? Girl-Why because your lovin it.
Boy- No because its fат and greasy

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Today I decided to burn a lot of calories... So I lit a fат kid on fire!!!

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Yo mama is so fат that she played the part of the iceberg in the film Titanic.

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I went to the doctor. I said I don’t find my wife attractive any more. He asked, how does your wife feel?
I said, fат and saggy, what about yours?

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This fат girl came on to me in a club..
“I’m out to get рissеd and have a good time, I’ve left the kids and my other half at home, ” She said,
“Fuск me, ” I replied, “just how big are you?”

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Fат Girl: lol I hate the gym so much
Guy: Did you mean to put a 'h' there?

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Your so fат you were rolling down a hill and you never stopped.

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New research has suggested that 1 in 3 men are too fат to see their own реnis.
That’s quite a good statistic, bearing in mind 9 out of 10 fат women never see one either.

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I was dancing with this fат girl in a club and she kept looking at her watch.
“It’s nearly twelve,” she said. “I’ll have to go.”
“Why, do you change into a beautiful princess?” I asked.
“No, you sarcastic сunт,” she replied. “The fuскing kebab shop shuts at one.”

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Top 5 worst things to say to airport security.
1. This pat-down is really turning me on.
2. I have a sword in my pants.
3. Would you like to buy some сосаinе? I can give you a special deal.
4. Why don’t you get a real job you fат f*ck?
5. Can you hurry up please? My bomb is due to explode in about 30 minutes!

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Just decided on my new career, I’m going to be a reverse stripper. My plan is to become really fат, get completely nакеd, and then force people to pay me to put my clothes back on.

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Comeback for gаy people!
Girl: Hey! You Fат Вiтсh! Why You So F*cking Gаy?
Boy: Because Girls Are Вiтсhеs!
Girl: So Your Gаy?! Ha!
Boy: Well At least I Can Get A Boy Friend!
Class: OOOOOOOHHHHHH!!!

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It ain't the jeans that make your вuтт look fат.

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