Fat people jokes

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If you know a fат person, leave them alone
They've already got a lot on their plate.

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Why are the Japanese so afraid of obese Americans?
The last time they let a Fат Man in their country, Nagasaki disappeared.

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Do you know how to make 5 pounds of fат look beautiful?
Put a niррlе on it.

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Did you guys hear about the fат geologist?
It wasn't a poor diet. It was the sedimentary lifestyle

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They say inside every fат person is a skinny person trying to get out.
But that's silly. Surely the skinny people aren't still alive after they eat them.

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What looks good on 5-pounds of fат?
A niррlе.

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Ever since my daughter was born people have said,
"She looks just like you!"
I'm not sure how to take that. I think -- maybe -- they're trying to be nice? But they've literally just said,
"Hey, your little girl looks just like a fат, balding middle aged man."

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What type of cookies do fат people eat?
Four сhin cookies.

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What's the best part about dating a fат girl?
They always know where they want to eat

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If Tumblr was edible
It would have alot of trans fat

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There's a fат man in a schoolyard.
A mother approaches him and asks:
"Are you waiting for a child?"
So he replies:
"No, I'm just fат"

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I don't know what made me feel more fat
That my fast food weighed so much in my passenger seat that my car told be to put a seat belt on it or that I was so concerned with its safety that I actually did.

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What do Rudolph and your mom have in common?
They'll both let fат men with eight bucks ride behind them.

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Why should you never bring a fат person to see a dramatic movie?
They will ruin the suspension.

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I ran into a fат guy on the way to work
Luckily I bounced back

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What do you call a fат guy with an unhealthy interest in his mother?
Adipose Rex.

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What does a waiter say to a fат person when it takes a long time to bring out the fат person's food?
Sorry about your weight

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I go through condoms like a fат man goes through ice cream!
I probably shouldn't have bought the ice cream flavored ones.

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