Food Jokes

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How do you lead a horse to water?
With lots of carrots.

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William: May I have some money for the man crying outside ?
Mum: What crying man ?
William: The one that's crying, 'Ice cream! Ice Cream !'

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What was Icarus’ least favorite food?
Hot wings.

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Q: Why don't blondes like making Kool-Aid?
A: They can't fit eight cups of water in the little packet.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a rooster with a jar of peanut butter?
A: A соск that sticks to the roof of your mouth.

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Q: What is the diffrence between a black guy and a pizza
A: A pizza can feed a family of four.

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A patient:
"Doctor, I don’t feel hungry after taking meal."
Doctor:
"Really, your condition is very serious. Wait a bit."
(After sometime, the doctor holds out some medicines).
Doctor:
"Take these pills. You take one pill after your sleep and another one before you get-up."

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Q: Have you heard about McDonald’s new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.

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What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that was out in the sun too long?
A runny bunny.

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Q: What's the difference between a cook and a gаy?
A: The cook stirs today's lunch, whereas the gаy stirs yesterday's dinner.

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This woman walks into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a christmas tree on her right inner thigh and a cocktail drink on her left inner thigh.
The tatoo artist say thats an unusual request. "Why do you want two tattoos there?"
So she says "Because my husband needs to eat between christmas and new years."

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When Chuck Norris eats dinner at a restaurant, the wait staff tips him.

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What do you call a school bus full of black people?
A rotten banana.

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Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.

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If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would you choose?
"Gandhi."
Why him?
"More food for me."

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Yo' Mama is so fат, she keeps her diaphragm in a pizza box.

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Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.

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Two flies sit on a pile of роор. One fly passes gas.
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey, do you mind? I'm eating here."

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