Lance is tooling down a lonely stretch of a backwoods Alabama highway, texting to his significant other, when WHAM! he hits something or someone.
He gets out of his car, and lying there, struggling and moaning is a black kid, probably in his late teens. “Dаrn niggеrs,” Lance mutters, “they jaywalk anywhere and everywhere.” He calls 911, but by the time an ambulance gets there, the black mofu is food for the worms.
A big-bellied Alabama sheriff rolls up to the scene and begins to write up a report. “You know this will affect your driving privileges,” the sheriff says. “Most likely about eight points.”
Lance is sweating. “Eight points and vehicular homicide. Will I still be able to drive here in Alabama, sir?”
The sheriff looks up from his writing out the report. “Oh this won’t affect your ability to drive, son. See, here in Alabama we have a bounty of these niggеrs. It’s open season all year. You get the eight points ADDED as a BONUS to your driving record, not the other way around.”
“Yup, I would say you landed yourself an eight point buck!”
A divorced billionaire was ordered by the Court to hand over a 49% share of his Corporation to his ex-wife. The Billionaire, we will call him Sam, was actively involved in acquiring properties wherever he chose. At an annual Board Meeting with his executives, the company stockholders, minus the ex-wife, were reviewing the land acquisitions during the time since Sam's divorce was finalized. They started a discussion of each property, one by one. "Fish Haven, Idaho, I see the aggression expression on that purchase", the one executive commented. Sam gave his nod of admission of its truth. The next company man made his statement, "Dog Walk, Kentucky", "Again we have an aggression expression, don't we Sam?" Sam concurred with that fact again. "Horse heads, New York," and the company man said,
"Aggression Expression with DRAMATIC innuendo!" Sam was all too willing to say yes and be understood as an angry and vengeful man. The next property on the roster was Canton, Ohio. "Canton, Ohio?” asked the 4th company man, "I don't see any sign of your conveyance of your indignation, to your ex, on this property name." Sam replied, "No, this acquisition was just to say I love Chinese food."