Military Jokes About The Army, And Air Force

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If you ask my son why he joined the Army he will proudly tell you he joined to military to кill people.
He's a terrible doctor.

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I asked my veteran friend what the first ranking is in the military, but I couldn't get a straight answer.
He just kept telling me it's private.

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So the US Military dropped a 22,000 lb bomb on ISIS today.
That moves Amy Shumer's special to the second spot for largest bomb for the year.

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This just in: A white flag factory has burned to the ground in Paris...
... Effectively crippling the French military.

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Did you know North Korea's military marches to the left?
They have no rights

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In Germany, we know of a joke
The French military.

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What's the most american US military branch?
The Air Force. They're USAF.

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What's a pirate's favorite school subject?
Arrrrrrrrt.
What's a pirate's favorite body part?
The arrrrrm.
What's a pirate's favorite branch of the military?
No. The Navy you idiот.

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What is the national bird of Pakistan?
An american military drone

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I was kicked out of the military because I got gonorrhea
It was a dishonorable discharge

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The US Military today confirmed that two marijuana users were killed when an aircraft crashed into a house shortly after takeoff.
Experts are saying it's the first recorded instance of killing two stoners with one bird.

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I saw a veteran begging in the street which made me very upset
But then I remembered I wasn't required to give the military quarters.

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Which branch of the military is the most American?
The Air Force, because they are US AF.

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Did you hear the one about the American military aviation enthusiast who bought himself a French fighter plane?
He was arrested for possession of an Аssаulт Rafale.

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I just bought a surplus French military rifle.
Only dropped once.

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While in the military I experienced both mustard gas and pepper spray...
I am a seasoned veteran.

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A young man goes to a military recruiting office and takes the required tests. The results aren’t great but the recruiter thinks he has potential to be in the Navy.
His scores were suboptimal.

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Why did the Norwegian military put barcodes on their ships?
So they could Scandinavian

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