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Most Popular Jokes

It’s so cold I saw a socialists with his hands in his own pockets.

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News and Politics Jokes Money jokes Political Jokes Weather jokes

My granddad always used to say;
"As one door closes, another one opens..."
Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.

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Old People Jokes Dad Jokes

A deer hunter asked his Pastor if it was a sin to hunt on Sunday.
"From what I hear about your aim," said the Pastor, "It's a sin for you to hunt anytime."

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Hunting Jokes Religion jokes Priest Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

Join the Army, meet some fascinating people, then кill them.

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Military Jokes Dark Humor Jokes Sick and Death Jokes

I quit my gym this morning because one of the instructors started shouting at me:
"Come on man, you've got to want it! Come on push. You can do it."
I hate being disturbed when I'm having a dump.

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Fitness jokes Communication Jokes

Q: Why did the blond layout on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?
A: She wanted to get a dark tan.

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Blonde Jokes Beauty Jokes Stupid Jokes

I'm sitting in a cafeteria next to a woman who was engrossed in her newspaper. One of the headlines blared: "12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed."
She shook her head at the sad news. Then, turning to me, she asked, "How many is a Brazilian?"

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Blonde Jokes One-Liner Jokes Military Jokes

Yo mama so ugly people dress up as her for Halloween!

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Yo Momma Jokes Halloween Jokes Ugly Jokes

Q: What does it mean if you were born in September?
A: That your parents started the new year with a ваng!

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Dirty jokes Sex Jokes New year jokes Birthday Jokes

Teacher: "Who knows what is a difference between a snowman and snowwoman?"
Little Johnny: "Three snowballs!"

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School Jokes Little Johnny Jokes Dirty jokes Communication Jokes

Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower in the morning to freshen up.

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Chuck Norris Jokes Science jokes

I can't wait for the day when I can drink wine with my kids instead of because of them.

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Parent Jokes Kids Jokes Drinking and Drunk Jokes Wine jokes

Two skeletons meet, and one asks the other, "Did you die before the Social Security reform, or after?"
"No, I'm still alive."

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Political Jokes Communication Jokes

Two girlfriends meet again after a few years. One is pushing around a baby buggy. The first girlfriend looks at the baby and is perplexed.
"Black skin? Blue slit eyes? A blonde afro? How did you do that?"
Murmurs the other woman.
"Dамn gаngваng! At least he doesn't bark!"

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Friendship Jokes Dirty jokes Sex Jokes Ethnic and Racial Jokes Baby Jokes Blonde Jokes

You know you're a redneck if your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back.

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Redneck jokes Stupid Jokes

If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by tomorrow morning.

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Dark Humor Jokes Food Jokes Flirt jokes Love Jokes

A young man and woman were eager to enjoy a picnic in the park one Saturday noon, and they opted to go through a fast-food drive-in for a quick snack.
They ordered, paid, got their bag of goodies, and headed for the park. When they opened the bag, it was full on money instead of the hamburgers they expected.
They rushed back to the fast-food place and returned the money.
"This is WONDERFUL," exclaimed the manager. "We've been looking for this money all morning and couldn't figure out where it could have been misplaced. You two are an honest couple. A lot of people would not have the morals and honesty to return the money. I'm going to call the TV and the newspapers and let everybody know what an honest deed you've done."
"Uh, don't do that," says the man, "my wife might see it on TV."

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Cheating Jokes Boss Jokes

Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office. I will find you. You have my Word.

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Computer Jokes Microsoft and Bill Gates Jokes Criminal Jokes

Q: How did the bishop make holy water?
A: He took some tap water and boiled the hеll out of it.

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Religion jokes One-Liner Jokes

A man was sitting in a bar and noticed a group of people using sign language. He also noticed that the bartender was using sign language to speak to them.When the bartender returned to him, the man asked how he had learned to use sign language. The bartender explained that these were regular customers and had taught him to speak in sign. The man thought that was great.A few minutes later the man noticed that the people in the group were waving their hands around very wildly. The bartender looked over and signed "Now cut that out! I warned you!" and threw the group out of the bar.The man asked why he had done that and the bartender said, "If I told them once I told them 100 times - NO SINGING IN THE BAR!"

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Bar and Bartender Jokes