Easter Jokes

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Three reasons why Jesus is better than the Easter Bunny.
1. Jesus died for mankind, Easter bunny dyes a few eggs.
2. Jesus loves you, Easter bunny just wants to make you fат.
3. Jesus tells the truth and shows us the way, Easter bunny deceives us and hides our eggs.

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A new wife prepared to bake a ham to celebrate their first Easter together. She carefully cut off each end of the ham before placing it in the pan.

Her husband asked her why she did that and she replied, "I don't know, it's what my mother always did. But I can ask her."

She called Mom, who responded, "I always saw your Grandma do it, so I did the same."

They decided to check further, so the young woman called Grandma, who explained, "It was the only way I could get it to fit into my pan."

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This Antarctican family decided to color eggs for Easter.
They agreed to dye them all white.

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A rooster was strutting around the henhouse one Easter morning and came across a nest of eggs dyed every color of the rainbow. The rooster took one look at the colorful display, ran outside and beat the heck out of the resident peacock.
- S.C. Herald-Journal -

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Q:Whats the best part of having Alzheimer’s?
A:You can hide your own easter eggs.

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What happened to the egg when he was tickled too much? He cracked up.

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The first person in the UK to have a double hand transplant will fulfill his ambition on Easter Monday to applaud the Leeds Rhinos rugby league team.
Personally my ambition would have been to have a wаnк.

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Q. What do Jesus and the Easter Bunny have in common?
A. They both taste good with wine.

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Easter this year is April Fools Day
Just remember that so you don't fall for any crazy stories like people coming back from the dead.

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I saw Arnold Schwarzenegger eating a chocolate egg.
I said to him, “I bet I know what your favorite Christian festival is.”
He said, “Have to love Easter, baby.”

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I accidentally drank the water we used to color eggs for Easter.
I think I dyed a little inside.

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I saw Batman leaving Church early on Easter
It was the first time I had seen a Christian Bale

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What has big ears, brings Easter treats, and goes “hippity-THUD, hippity-THUD, hippity-THUD?
The Easter Elephant.

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Why do easter eggs hide?
Because they're little chickens.

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Boy asks his dad why his sister is called Teresa
“Well son, it’s because your mother loves anagrams and she also loves Easter, Teresa is an anagram of Easter”
“Thanks dad”
“No problem Alan”

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Son: Mom, why is my sister called Teresa?
Mom: Because Teresa is an Anagram of Easter and we love Easter!
Son: Oh I see. Thanks mom!
Mom: My pleasure Alan.

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How does the Easter Bunny keep his ears standing straight up?
He uses Hare Spray...
(Ill see myself out)

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There are 3 perks of having Alzheimer
1. You can make new friends every day.
2. You can look for the Easter eggs you hid yourself.
3. You can make new friends every day.

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